ChapterFive
Beth was feeling good after all the treatments and ready for the next step in her bucket list bonanza. She was supposed to be meeting up with the three guys who were going to be her Valentine menage partners, and she was still fretting about what to wear when the sound of a phone message provided a welcome distraction.
Welcome for all of about thirty seconds, anyway.
Some of that feel good factor dissipated when she read the text.
Unfortunately, due to unforeseen circumstances, your scheduled meet and greet, this evening, cannot go ahead.
Beth sat heavily on the bed and stared at the phone display. Unforeseen circumstances. She wondered what that meant exactly. Had one of them been taken ill? What about the others? Would they have the opportunity to meet up again before the big night? She wished the message offered a bit more information.
The four of them were supposed to be having dinner together then taking a tour of the club. The idea was that they got to know each other, discussed their limits and their expectations, before familiarizing themselves with Iniquity. It was one of those things that had put Beth at ease.
Now her bubble had been burst and she felt herself floundering a little. She would have liked to get a feel for the men she was going to scene with.
Oh, she knew it wasn’t completely necessary. She’d visited the occasional club, when finances allowed, where she’d scened with complete strangers. But they’d been simple scenes; nothing on this scale. This was a massive thing for her, and she’d wanted to be comfortable about everything before she dived in.
She sighed. She guessed it couldn’t be helped, but she still found herself a little resentful. It’s not like there was only one guy in this scenario. If something happened to one, surely the others could have still made it?
She wanted this so much, but she also wanted it to be right. She wanted to be at ease with the men she’d been paired with and wanted there to be proper discussions on how everything would play out, so they were all on the same page.
Now she found herself wrong footed and anxious as well as a little pissed. Not the most auspicious start.
Pulling herself together, she decided to put herself out there and have dinner at the Tartarean restaurant that evening, regardless of the change in plan. If she was honest with herself, she’d been avoiding it so far, not wanting to dine alone.
Okay, so she did anyway, but room service in the comfort of her fancy penthouse suite didn’t seem quite as sad as dining solo in front of a bunch of other guests where everyone could see she was all on her own, like Billy no mates… And where she could see all the happy couples who had everything she wanted but didn’t have.
Tonight though, despite the recent disappointment, she felt like she could shrug all that off and just be the sexy, confident woman she aspired to be. The one she was most of the time. The one she strived to be because she’d vowed never to go back to the poor little plump girl mindset she used to struggle with.
Well, that and because she didn’t want to dwell on the fact she’d been stood up because if she did it would sour her feelings towards her menage partners and that would only lead to things getting uncomfortable.
This meant too much to her to sit alone, brooding about it.
Mostly, these days, she could define her discontent as being because she was unhappy with her job; because she was staring down the wrong side of her youth; because she would like to settle down and start a family. Not because of her weight. But that didn’t mean the doubts stopped creeping in, or that sometimes, during those long and lonely evenings alone, she didn’t break down and wonder if she didn’t have all those things because of her weight.
The difference was she knew, deep down inside, that she was excellent at her job, that she was loyal and loveable and passably pretty, and none of those things had anything to do with her figure. She simply hadn’t arrived at the right place in her life yet.
But she would, and tonight she was going to go out there and behave like she was worth it, because she was! And anyone who didn’t think so - well, that was their problem. They were the one at fault, not her.
With that in mind, she walked into the restaurant with her head held high and confidence in her step. Like her therapist had always told her. It was fine if you weren’t feeling it all the time. But those times when you weren’t, just fake it until you made it, because it was all about the way you came across. Sure, Beth had a few wobbles, but she knew from experience it was true; confidence was every bit as attractive as being skinny.
And tonight she didn’t need to fake it. Tonight, after all her pampering, she really did feel gorgeous.
“Good evening, ma’am. My name is Jed and I’ll be your server tonight. Can I get you a drink while you decide on your order?”
Wow! The service here was impeccable. Beth had been ushered in and shown to her table immediately. It was a nice table, with a lovely position on the patio overlooking the beach and the sea beyond. She’d been grateful that they hadn’t stuffed her in a corner somewhere since she was a lone diner, as that had often been her experience in the past. And they weren’t behind the curve. The table for one she was shown to had no glaring reminders that she’d been stood up. That would have been awkward.
She looked up at the handsome young man who had spoken and gave him a happy smile. “Please, call me Beth. Ma’am makes me feel far older than I’d like,” she told him.
He threw an easy smile back at her, all perfect white teeth and dancing blue eyes. “As you wish, Beth. So how about that drink?”
Damn he was cute. A couple of years younger than she was, for sure, but still mighty fine to look at with his blond, blue-eyed, classic all-American good looks.
“Thank you, I’ll have a rhubarb gin with ice, if you have it, please.”
“Coming right up,” Jed replied, again with that megawatt smile, as he jotted it down on his electronic tablet. No pads and pens for this restaurant.
He was back before Beth had even read through the appetizers on the menu. She blinked at him in surprise as he set down her drink, garnished with a slice of lemon and a sprig of mint, on a coaster. “That was quick.”