Oh.
He wasn’t lashing out because he was furious, she realized numbly.
He was acting like this because he was in pain.
Because of her.
She didn’t know how it was that she had been able to hurt him. All she knew was that she had, and she couldn’t bear it. “Vassi—-”
He cut her off, asking, “Why did you do it?” His voice was toneless, his gaze bleak. “Why did you tell him about us?”
Seri almost stumbled back as she realized what he was talking about.
“Is this all really just a fucking game to you? Is it because your pride couldn’t take it when I turned you down? And that’s why you’re risking my place in the family?”
Her heart lurched at the pain in his words, and she stammered, “Vassi, it’s not like that—-”
“How can it not be?” he asked hoarsely. “You know, given a choice, everyone will turn their backs on me the moment they realize I’m fucking their precious little girl. And who can blame them? I’m the worst reminder of how she made a fool of Papa, while you’re the living reminder of everything that was good—-”
“Vassi, please.” Even as tears blurred her gaze, she reached for him, but he pushed her away, and it hurt.
But not as much as knowing that he was hurting, too, and it was all because of her selfish, mindless choices.
“Our family – this family – is everything to me,” Vassi said harshly. “Everything. And all my life, it’s the only thing I’ve asked God for – that our family stay complete, that no one breaks it apart the way my mother did, but goddammit, when I found out you told him about us—-” He shook his head. “It’s like you’re setting me up so I lose everything, and what for? What for? All because I didn’t fuck you on your eighteenth—-”
“Stop!” She threw herself at him, and even as he tried to push her away, she only tightened her arms around his neck. When he started to speak, she stood on her toes and covered his mouth with hers.
He would only say more hurtful things, and she couldn’t let him do that any longer. The words hurt – but not as much as it was hurting him to say it.
And it was all her fault, she thought painfully. She embraced him more tightly, wishing there was a way to draw his pain into her.
Hadn’t she always known how much family meant to Vassi?
And yet she had still forced him to play her games.
Even knowing how much he had to lose.
And now, she had even driven him to the corner, forcing him to play the villain when all along it was her who was wrong.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered brokenly.
She was sorry for being arrogant, sorry for thinking that Vassi was wrong and that she was right. She was sorry for thinking that she knew what the future held and that she was the only one who could make him happy.
She closed her eyes.
“I’m sorry.”
Because now she realized that all along she had believed she was the special girl who deserved to love Vassi and be loved by him because she had wanted, needed, to believe it.
But the truth was, no one really could predict love.
One could only take the risk and fall, and when they did—-
Someone either caught them.
Or they kept falling.
When Vassi made a move to push her away, she knew she was going to take one last chance to convey her feelings to him.
Rising on her toes, she kissed him one last time.
I love you, she told him with that kiss.
She gave everything with that kiss, her heart, her mind, her body, her soul.
Everything.
She was his, and maybe this time it would be enough for Vassi to take the risk with her.
Maybe this time, she would no longer need to blackmail him into staying with her.
Maybe this time, he would choose her.
But it was too late.
Because at that moment, someone else had walked into the library, and it was the last person who should have seen them together.
“Vassi? Seri?”
Papa.
His tone was incredulous and strained, and when Vassi stiffened in the circle of her arms, Seri knew at that moment there was only one thing to do.
Pulling away, she turned towards Fyodor, lips curling in a mocking smile. “Oops. You found us out, Papa.”
Vassi caught her arm from behind. “Seri, let me—-”
“Oh, no need,” she said airily. She touched his fingers, which were still curled around her arm. “Let go, Vassi.”
His arms tightened. “No. I don’t like the look in your eyes—-”
“Will either of you explain what’s going on?” Fyodor grated out.
Seri sighed. “It’s very simple, Papa.” She smiled up at Vassi. “I’m not the girl either of you think I am.” She reached up to caress Vassi’s cheek, murmuring, “You see, I’ve been busy trying to seduce your youngest son, but he keeps refusing me. I’ve even let him accidentally watch me shower—-”