Love is death. And accepting her into this world would ensure her life expectancy significantly reduces. One day, she’d earn a fatal bullet on account of me, because that's how all this will end.
I’mTomás Souza, the ruler of a mighty kingdom with the power at my fingertips to burn it all to shit—for her, if I choose. Except my stomach roils with the vision of that outcome. How my brothers would be targets and my mother vulnerable to every fucker out there. I can face my own inevitable end, but I couldn’t live with myself knowing I’d sacrificed their lives for my happiness—or hers.
What happened after that kiss nearly ripped my heart out as an offering to the goddess I’m in awe of. She’d rummaged in the cupboards under the vanity and held out her small palm, handing me the blood red signet ring my father wore every day of my life.
The ring that signifies death by the hand of a Souza. A symbol we wear after the first life we’ve taken. I should have received mine at the age of eight, but no one knew I’d ended my uncle’s suffering that day.
I thought I’d lost Papá’s ring the night history repeated itself. I remember removing it and everything after that is lost to the savage black wrath that took over. Everything, until the moment I had seen her again. The woman who makes my world stop spinning, dulls the constant noise, and makes my numbness come alive.
Handing it over is a risk she didn’t need to take, but a decision she made on the day I buried him. She did that for me when other women would have sold it for cash on the black market.
“Morning, mate.” Shane joins me on the sunny terrace, his sunglasses reflecting my exhausted face back at me. “Are you sure about this?”
I nod, sipping my coffee slowly. “We’ll show them we’re not afraid. Papá hid behind these gates for too many years. Now they’ll see I’m not hiding. I’ll be fucking everywhere.” My voice turns hoarse, the result of a night spent with Carina cuddled up next to me.
I laid awake as she slept, drinking in the sight of my rare little butterfly so close to my flames. Her colorful wings were scorched and her wholesomeness jaded. She understands this is a short-term arrangement, but what she’ll never comprehend is how she’s unlocked a side of me that no one has ever known. Not even me. It’s her privilege and our curse.
Shane drags a cushioned seat out and sits at the table beside me. “The second they land; our guys will remove their weapons. I’ve no doubt they’ll disagree with the order to visit the Souza residence unarmed.”
The fountain bubbles calmly in the background, doing nothing to soothe my vexed mood. “If they don't hand over their weapons, then treat them as a potential threat. They have no need to protect themselves against me unless they intend to strike first.”
I’ve invited a few of the top leaders within our organization to meet with me later this afternoon. Loyal men from Miami, Rio, California, and Europe are flying into Bogotá. From there, my men would transport them individually to the plantation to make sure they aren’t followed. The plan is to send the right message from the start of my reign. I’m in control—full fucking stop.
“You look tired.” He points out, lifting the coffee pot and filling a cup to the brim. “That girl of yours keeping you up all night?” His chuckle turns into a hum when he puts the steamy coffee to his lips.
“I slept well,” I lie, the image of Carina’s marked buttocks at the forefront of my mind.
I checked them this morning while she was sleeping and then left my suite for my usual routine. It gave me a primal buzz to see how I’d punished her and then fucked away the pain. Knowing it's after midday, she’d have eaten the breakfast I sent to her room and used the jacuzzi to ease her aches. “Keep an eye on her when they arrive. Don’t leave her alone with anyone if I’m preoccupied.”
I ignore the cryptic look he gives me, riled by the silent assessment he’s clearly considering. “You can still marry the Morales girl and have Carina as your mistress,” Shane adds thoughtfully.
“Have you been speaking with my mother? She suggested the very same thing.” I look away from him and gaze out at the swaying trees in the distance.
It would mean locking her up and starving her of a life filled with experiences and adventures. She’d become the most protected creature in the world, worshiped like the goddess she is to me and resentful of her invisible bars and clipped wings.
I’d rather she bloomed freely rather than to cut her off from the world and watch her die slowly. Even if it means I never get to touch her again.
“You have options. That’s all I’m saying.” Shane reaches for the sugar cubes and plops two in before he stirs. “She likes you. I can tell,” he adds.
I laugh under my breath and flick my gaze to his. “Right, Shane. Since when do you know what women think? I’ve more or less forced her to stay with me. It’s the big windfall she’ll earn that has her heart racing, not the way I make her scream.”
Shane stares at me with his reflective lenses hiding his eyes. “Money can’t buy the look on her face when you enter the room, or when you're standing right next to her. It’s like she’s in lo—”
“Don’t finish that sentence. She doesn’t know me.” I snap, at the end of my tether with whole fucking scenario.
“She might not, but I do. I know you pretty well, cabrón. And it’s not just her who has that same look. You’re obsessed with the kid and, from what I can see, she means something to you.”
The man who’s killed more men than he’s screwed women, and that’s a lot, is sitting here telling me Carina is my happy ever after, even when our hearts are corrupted beyond repair.
“We don’t get happy endings, Shane. It’s a bullet or a bomb blast. You, of all people, should know that.” I rub the sudden sharp pain in my chest. “I don’t want that for her.” My hiss could poison wildflowers with the acrimony my words drip with. “I want you to personally escort her to Bogotá in the chopper tomorrow. I’ve already arranged for her cash to be packed up into bags. It's ready to go when she is.”
He nods, understanding how cruelty and violence are second nature to me—to us. Letting her leave before I do shouldn’t be a problem, especially when she finally gets her hands on the money. That should sweeten the deal she’s been tied to.
But as I continue to drink my tepid coffee, I recall the intense emotion that snowballed inside my stone cold heart when I saw her beautiful face—tragic and glittering with tears. It’s with that memory I suspect letting her go would be the hardest decision I’d ever make.
“No problem.” Shane confirms. “When you tell her about your wedding, I’m sure she’ll take the money and run as far away as possible.”
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