“Wolf, you’re not used to answering to anyone but yourself,” Sawyer said.
“And you,” Wolf said. “Because you’re always on hand to tell me what you think I ought to be doing.”
“Sometimes you need it. But anyway, you don’t listen. You don’t listen, so what difference does it make if I tell you what I think you should do, or I don’t? You do exactly what you want no matter what.”
“And you’re different?”
Evelyn nodded. “You’re not different,” she said to her husband, patting him on the forearm. “Although, to his point, Wolf, you are not friendlier. You are, in fact, deeply unfriendly.”
“Friendly enough that I got her pregnant in the first place,” Wolf grumbled.
“That’s not friendly,” Evelyn said. “That’s something else.”
He drained the last of his coffee and stood up. “I’m done with this bullshit. Let’s go do some work.”
They all stood, with the exception of Evelyn, who kicked back in her chair and tipped her cup to her lips. “Coming to dinner tonight?”
“We’ll see,” he said.
Violet had seemed hesitant when he’d talked to her about it last night. But then, she had known that she’d switched the beds, and that he hadn’t seen them yet. So maybe some of it was that. That she had been anticipating his reaction.
They all walked out to their respective trucks, and as he opened the driver’s-side door, Sawyer turned to him. “Do you need anything? Is there...some older brother thing I should be doing to help you through this?”
“You want to tell me to quit crying and just get on with it?”
He had meant it to sound like a joke. A reference to what had happened after his mother had left. And hell, it wasn’t like it was Sawyer’s fault. He’d been eight. And he hadn’t known how to be sensitive. Hadn’t known what to do with his crying little brother. He wasn’t mad about it.
Sawyer looked down. “I’m sorry about that.”
“Don’t be. You were a kid. And hell, at the end of the day, you’re right. There’s no point crying.”
“But a kid is going to cry when his mother leaves. I was just angry because I’d already been through it and I didn’t want to feel bad for you. I still felt bad for myself. I was just a selfish asshole, Wolf.”
“You were eight,” Wolf said. “You were not a selfish asshole. You were a child. And if anything makes me determined to be part of my kid’s life, it’s that. The fact that we... Look at how we talk to each other. About our childhood. You think you should have done better by me. Your mother doesn’t think she should have done better by you. Same as mine doesn’t think she should have done better by me. Our dad probably still thinks he’s a damned hero. For not letting us starve. Which was the bare minimum. And if there was a bare minimum, you could be sure that he was going to do it. I’m not going to be like that. I don’t want my kid to be standing around talking to his cousin asking why the hell his dad left him to his own devices. And you stepped up.”
“Yeah,” Sawyer said. “I did. I love Bug. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And with it, Evelyn. But it was a life I decided I was ready to have, Wolf.”
“Yeah. Well. I’m not ready. Not for any of it. But it’s happening. So what’s my excuse?”
“People find them. You know they do.”
“I’m not going to,” Wolf said. He started to get in his truck, then stopped. “She disassembled my bed and moved it into her room.”
“Shewhat?”
“She didn’t like the bed in her room. So she didn’t move into my bedroom. The varmint disassembled my bed and moved it into her bedroom, and moved the little twin bed into mine.”
“When do I get to meet her?” Sawyer asked, smiling. “Because I think I like her.”
Wolf grumbled as he got into his truck, and when he started the engine, he had to admit to himself that he liked her, too. And that was one of the very annoying things. He liked her an awful lot. And he wouldn’t have chosen to put the poor girl in his path. Not on a permanent basis. Connor was right. She was sweet. But she was more than that. She was feisty as hell. And he didn’t want to be part of breaking that.
Breaking her.
“Too late for guilt,” he muttered to himself.
He hadn’t felt any when it counted. When he could have turned back. So he wasn’t deserving of it now.
And he would do well to remember that.