“Good night,” Violet said to her parents.
He nodded. And followed her up the stairs. He didn’t say anything to Violet as he went into his room. And he did his best to just pretend that today hadn’t happened.
Instead of replaying her words in his head, he just thought about his plans for the cabin.
Yeah. He would think about that. Because they needed a nursery. Yeah, there were two bedrooms, but it wasn’t enough. They would need to do something better for the baby, and Violet probably needed a more modern kitchen.
He stripped his clothes off and walked through to the bathroom that connected to his bedroom. The shower was large, with dark tile and a big showerhead. And the amount of water it sprayed out was almost enough to drown out the thoughts inside him. So he would take that. He turned it on and stood beneath it, letting the heat burn it all away.
He felt a cool breeze and turned, to see the shower door open and Violet walk through. Naked.
“What are you doing?”
She looked at him, her eyes large and overly serious, filled with tears. “I wanted to see you. And you went to bed awfully quick.”
“We’re under your father’s roof,” he said. “He was pretty clear on this kind of thing.”
“Yes, we are under my father’s roof. But we are living our lives. And I needed to see you. Wolf, I just need you.”
She touched him, and it was gentle. Everything about what was happening right now was gentle. And he didn’t want that. He didn’t know what to do with it. What would come next? More words of love? And what then?
No, he knew how to do certain things. He could be honorable. He could build her a house. He could be her husband. He could take her to heaven every single night in his arms. And he could keep on doing. Making his brother proud, working the ranch, building the legacy. Making her dad happy that he’d given permission for her to marry him. He could do that. It was the rest that he couldn’t figure out. It was the rest that made him feel like he was dying.
So he kissed her. He kissed her, because he could do that. He kissed her because when he touched her, it drowned out everything else. It burned it all away.
He thought again of that day on the beach. Of the lightness there. And he thought about what she’d said about happiness. Dammit, had they been kids then? Because he didn’t feel like he’d been a kid since he was six years old. But it had felt light then. It felt easy. And what had come on the heels of that?
Everything.
The baby and marriage, andI love you. And he couldn’t feel the good side of that. He couldn’t feel that joy that she was talking about. All he could see was an abyss. Dark and black, and pain that wouldn’t have a bottom. Fiery, tearing, horrendous pain that would never ever find the end.
And the beast inside him took control. Because the beast... The beast was him. And it always had been. Desperate, needy. And pushing away everybody with the power of his love. That was what it was there for. To hold them all at a distance.
But it could dothis.
It could hold her close. As long as they were naked.
So he kissed her.
And slid his hands over her water-slicked skin, luxuriated in the desire that he felt for her. And the fact that his cock was so hard it hurt. And the fact that he wanted her so much he couldn’t see straight. He pushed his hands between her thighs and felt how slick she was, felt how much she wanted him, too. Because she did. She might want love, she might want tenderness, she might want sweet words, but she wanted his body more.
She wouldn’t hold this hostage for those words, because she couldn’t say no to him. Silence... All that silence afterI loveyou. All that space.
There was no space here.
She was looking up at him like she might die if she couldn’t have him, and that was what he felt. If he couldn’t be inside her...
Violet.
It was an obsession. It was an addiction. And it had been from the beginning. If he couldn’t have her, then there was nothing. So where was the happy side to that? Where was the sweet to the bitter? Because he sure as hell couldn’t find it, unless he was inside her body. The only thing he craved.
He would take the rest right along with it. But this was all he cared about.
He pushed his fingers inside her, thrusting in and out, watching as her eyes went cloudy, as her jaw went slack. And she moaned. “Quiet,” he said. “Don’t make a sound. Don’t say a word. You want your daddy to know what you’re getting up to in the shower?”
She bit her lip, shaking her head.
“You’re a bad girl, Violet Donnelly. Letting me fuck you in your dad’s house, against his wishes.”