“Hadley,” he whispered, his voice rough.
“I’ll see you on Wednesday.” I turned and walked towards my SUV. I didn’t look back at him as I went.
But as I drove away, I couldn’t resist looking in the rearview mirror. Calder stood there, illuminated by the moonlight. His hands were shoved into his pockets, and he looked so damn forlorn. I kept driving anyway. Because if I leaned into Calder and he wasn’t there? The last shreds of my heart would be torn apart.
7
Calder
I stoodthere watching as the taillights faded into the night. Hell. I could feel the hurt pouring off Hadley in waves. The bone-deep sorrow carved into her marrow. And there didn’t seem to be anything I could do about it.
I gave a piece of gravel a healthy kick and turned back to the house. Hayes opened the front door as I climbed the steps. He extended a beer to me. “Figured we could all use one of these.”
I grunted in ascent. I needed something a hell of a lot stronger than beer.
Hayes headed towards a grouping of rockers on the front porch and eased down into one. I followed, taking the one next to him. We were silent as we stared out into the dark fields. The deep purple of the sky was crystal-clear tonight, making the stars almost look fake; they shone so brightly.
There was a tug in the vicinity of my chest. What I should’ve done was jump into Hadley’s SUV and found a mountain to tear down. I should’ve helped her forget all about the hurt her mother had heaped onto her.
Even just thinking about it made my hand tremble. The result of want battling with fear and responsibility.
“You sound like you’re thinking pretty hard over there.” Hayes’ voice cut into my thoughts.
“You’re pretty loud yourself.”
He chuckled, but it was a hollow sound. Not the full-bodied laugh my friend, who was more like a brother, usually let fly. “It’s getting worse. I thought after everything had been put to rest with Everly’s attacker, Mom would relax. Loosen the reins a bit. But I swear she’s even harder on Hadley now.”
Hayes couldn’t even bring himself to say the name of the man who had kidnapped Everly. Ben had been a childhood friend of Ev’s who’d formed a sort of obsession. But she’d made it out and was safe now.
I scraped at the edge of the bottle’s label. “It triggered things for your mom. Now, she’s like a dog with a bone that’s been stolen once before. She’s not letting go for anything.”
He scrubbed a hand over his face and was quiet for a moment. “I don’t know how to fix it.”
“I don’t think you can.”
Hayes glanced in my direction. “You see much of Hads lately? Seems like something’s different with you two.”
Something was different. The scene at the accident had pulled the blinders back when it came to Hadley. I’d been so focused on how reckless I thought Hadley was being that I’d missed how much she was hurting. “I don’t know if we’ll ever find our way back to the type of friendship we had before.” We were too different now, and there was too much baggage. “But I care about her, and I know this is eating her up inside.”
“She won’t talk to me. It drives me nuts.”
“You’re too involved.”
The Easton family had wounds that had never healed right, and in an effort to stanch the loss of blood, they’d stitched things closed in a way that wasn’t entirely healthy. I didn’t know any way to fix that, other than to rip things open. And I wasn’t sure anyone in the Easton clan was ready for that.
Hayes took a pull of his beer. “She needs to talk to someone.”
I wanted Hadley to talk to me. I wanted to be the one she shared all of her secrets with again. The one who helped make things better for her. But I wasn’t sure I could be. For so many reasons.
“Will you try?”
Hayes’ words cut through the night, taking me by surprise.
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea. She’ll probably take my head off.”
It was what Hadley always did when people pushed. But if I pushed, it would be even worse.
Hayes met my gaze. “Then wear a damned helmet. I’m desperate, Calder. I’ve tried everything I can. I can’t have my family falling apart now.”