A few hours later, we’re leaving our physics class together. The last bell of the day has rung, and as much as I want to take her hand in mine, I’m aware that others are constantly watching us, and we have a sibling relationship to uphold. I chuck her in the shoulder instead, and she immediately drops her books.
“Oops, sorry, that was too hard,” I tell her and lean down to pick them up.
“God, how annoying to have your brother in your class!” Amy Richtner says as she walks past us. “You two are like twins.”
“Tell me about it,” Kat replies without much enthusiasm.
“So what’ll it be? Pizza? Handball? Let’s forget about Vitelli’s and do the dune picnic. I want to spoil you, and I might have already phoned in a favor,” I tell her. “To make tonight special.”
“For real? Henry did you a favor? I’d think the only favor he’d do us is seeing us off the face of this earth, gladly, with enthusiasm. Push us right off the cliff when we’re not looking.”
“I’ve got the connections,” I tell her as we head to our lockers.
I carry Kat’s backpack as we make our way to the car. We joke and play, stopping to talk to a few friends. No one would guess the weight we carry. The immense grief of orphans, the shame of loving someone forbidden. Kat and I may act like we breeze through this life, but our destiny feels cursed and our fate sealed with strife. We can’t outrun our pasts, and where we come from has already contaminated our future—forever.
“Should we even go back to Wainscott Hollow and face the parade of drunk frats? Or should we park near the dunes and walk out to the beach? We can sneak back when we think they’re all passed out or gone.”
Walking into your own house and not feeling welcome is a phenomenon I’ve gotten used to. I walk on eggshells around Henry, who will fly off the handle about anything. We pull into the gravel parking lot of the estate, which is packed with showy cars. These kids go to fancy colleges and make it known by the stickers adorning their rides—no subtlety about anything in their lives. Even if their parents bought their way into these institutions, they’re not afraid to flaunt it.
Once we park, Kat lays her forehead on the steering wheel, delaying getting out.
“Don’t want to walk into the den of wolves? Take the entrance over the garage, and I’ll go in and make small talk,” I offer. I have about as much desire to do that as peeling off my toenails.
“Naw, I can handle it. It’s just that I’ve gained a decent amount of weight since I’ve seen all these people, and they’re not the type to let me live it down. I’m preparing myself for the fat insults disguised as compliments, that’s all.”
“Well, you look incredible and I love every ounce of you. And if it’s any consolation, I’m sure these guys have all lost a significant number of brain cells even though they’re in college. All the coke and beer pong will do that to you. Hell, half of them are probably already balding and using Viagra and you’re gonna feel insecure because you’ve gotten even more beautiful?”
We hold hands on instinct, and then drop them right as we pass through the entrance. The guys are in the den, and you can already smell the expensive cigar smoke. Kat and I meander in, and the conversation drops off. Everyone gawks at the two of us—a clear sign that these fools were gossiping about us.
“Katelyn, Heath,” Eddie Lind nods at us. The only jerk in the room decent enough to say hello.
Katelyn smiles sheepishly as she waves a hand in his direction. Eddie’s eyes light up, and he’s unfazed by Kat’s weight gain or how much I’ve shot up. The others titter and scoff like they can’t wait for us to leave and get the scoop from their petty king, Henry the Sloth.
“You want to join us for a Brandy and catch up?” Eddie offers.
“No than—”
“Sure, that’d be cool,” Kat responds, cutting me off.
“Sure, why not?” I mock.
We step all the way into the room and scurry over to Eddie to escape the gaze of the rest.
Eddie tells us about Duke, his apartment, his classes, and such. Kat offers up her experience of her last year at Fairmont and what we do for fun in Montauk and Wainscott Hollow.
“You should come to Duke,” Eddie suggests enthusiastically. “Apply. I’m sure you’d get in.”
Kat grins. “Don’t you only have a year left?”
Something turns my stomach over, like a giant fish doing a belly flop. Kat is sweet with Eddie, almost like she’s flirting. I recognize her demeanor, that coy smile, how she twirls a thin strand of hair and tilts her head as she charms him.