She didn't reply, just stared me down, those green eyes burning into mine.
"Shaun..." I said, but didn't know what to say next.
He just stood there for a moment, blue eyes staring just as my Tirian's had, but they encapsulated a whole world of pain within them. The thing was, I was surprised to see it. He never gave away much, never really talked about himself. I didn’t want to see him hurting, but I had no idea how to prevent that. I walked towards him, hoping I could work it out as I went along. The problem was, his face said he knew.
"Mate, she said she's still finding her way in this. It doesn't mean—" Jack started, but Shaun shook his head, tossing his beer bottle into the nearby bin and then ran off, leaping over the fence and disappearing into the darkness. “I fucking hate this process,” Jack said, eyes trained on the ground. “C’mon, Hawk, let’s get you set up.”
And then there were ten.
I turned to Slade's family and said, "I'm so sorry about all of this." What the hell must they think of me?
"Oh, don't you worry a bit," Cheryl said, giving me the best mumsy smile ever. "This was nothing compared to some petitioning ceremonies. No blood spilled, no broken bones, it's almost a disappointment, really." Her grin grew cheeky and suddenly, I could see the family resemblance. "Rest up, my love, if you can with that tribe of men, and we'll see you for a family dinner in a few days and get to know each other then."
"Good luck," Lisa said, casting an eye over the guys.
"Lisa, stop stirring the pot," Brock said.
"Any of them give you grief, including our boy, you just tell us," Angus said.
“Especially our boy. Always feel free to come to us. No matter what the issue is," Jim said.
I nodded, feeling a swell in my throat as I did so. I'd been doing it on my own for some time now, my brother fairly uninterested when I'd told him the troubles I was having when I was looking for work. To be a part of a family again... I couldn't thank them or make some socially appropriate response that they absolutely deserved, but they seemed to sense what I was feeling, if the pats on the shoulder were anything to go by. And then they were gone too.
I went to pick up some beer bottles left on tables, but Slade shook his head.
"The clean-up crew'll be by tomorrow. Don't get used to it, they just do it for the newly bonded, assuming we're too busy producing the next generation to worry about such prosaic things. C'mon inside, princess, you look completely done in."
I nodded, grateful in that moment that I didn't have to explain or fight to get them to understand how I felt. It was a little scary though, because giving me permission to just feel brought with it a sudden onslaught of emotion. A hot rush of gratitude when Slade took my hand and led me inside, a deep sense of wonder at what I felt come rushing down the bond. I kicked off my shoes by the back door, the cool of the wooden floorboards a slight shock as we padded deeper into the house. I was almost glad most of the lights were off, the details of the new place shrouded in a soft gloom. I couldn't take any more new right now, but of course, the universe wasn't going to let that fly.
"The main suite is through here," Slade said, and he pushed open the door, then we all stopped.
There, standing next to the largest, widest bed I'd ever seen, were Jack and Hawk. That golden chest I'd seen hints of through open shirts was on full display, the long, lithe muscles working as he kissed Hawk with everything he had.
What Brandon and Aaron had together was just play, I realised as I watched, unable to move from the shock of it. I'd never seen it before, but this was someone's soul passed to another in a kiss. And Hawk took it, returning it with equal passion, the big broad muscles in his shoulders quivering with the effort of holding back as he clawed at his lover. Finally, Jack pulled away, wiping his mouth on his hand and taking a step away, then he returned, as if they were pulled to each other like magnets.
"Stay here. I'll let the boss know what's going on. I'll be back, if I'm allowed." He glanced at me. "Tomorrow if possible, if not, then later in the week."
"I love you," Hawk rumbled.
"Don't say it." Jack's voice broke, his eyes going wild. "You know I know, so don't say it."
Hawk went to pull him back, but the blond man strode over to me, fire flashing in his eyes. "Give him a chance. Please." The plea was tacked on as an afterthought. "He's gonna kill me for saying this, but if I don't, he'll just simmer there, all torn up with longing and need, and you'll never know better."
"Jack!" Hawk's voice was ragged.
"I'm not asking you to bond with him, I know I can't ask for that, but give him a chance. I'll give you whatever you want, fight any bloke. Fuck, I'll bring you my bloody mother's head, if that's what it takes. Just, please."
My hand went automatically to his hip, the warm skin just above the low waistband of his work pants. I don't know why I did it. Maybe because people had reached out to me when I was hurting, and I was bloody grateful for it. Maybe it was just all that perfect wrought flesh so close to mine. Strange flesh, a whole undiscovered country. When I looked up, his pupils had blown huge and black, the green of his eyes just a thin rim.
"Let me come for you in a day or two," he said. His eyes flicked up when a growl came from the guys at my back. "After you've had some time to settle in with them. Whatever you want, love." His hand took mine from his hip and placed it on his cheek. "I'll organise it."
‘Yes’ was sitting there on the tip of my tongue, but then I felt that thrumming bond between Slade and I as he stepped closer.
"What do you think?" I said.
"You want to give him a go. I can smell it. It's your decision, but I say go for it, if that's what you want." He turned to Jack. "You fucking hurt her, and I'll break every bone in that pretty face. You won't be sucking anyone's dick for a time after I get through with you."
"Right back at ya," Jack said, looking over his shoulder at Hawk. "I gotta go before we start fighting or fucking. I'll be in touch."