Page 35 of Lessons Learned

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“Good to see you again. What can I get you?”

I take a quick look around the bar, wondering if I’m up for putting myself in a dangerous situation tonight or not.

What would an attacker think if they pulled my jeans down and found another man’s dried cum still marking my skin?

Would he wipe it away? The thought of that happening is unnerving.

“Just a Coke, please,” I tell Drake with a quick smile.

He steps away to make my drink, grinning at me when he comes back.

“Not going to join your friends tonight?”

I don’t have to look over my shoulder to know he’s talking about the Cerberus guys.

I shake my head. “Looking for a different type of trouble tonight.”

He chuckles as I wink at him before he walks away to help another customer.

The guys and Slick don’t watch me the same way that the committed people at the clubhouse do. They’re less judgmental, having their own kinks and ways to blow off steam. The ones in relationships are the ones I catch following me across the room. They can’t believe the things I’ve done in my life and called it work. They can’t wrap their heads around the situations I’ve put myself in, but I’m not theirs to judge.

“You’ve been gone for a few days.”

I look over, giving Aro a genuine smile. The man flirts with everyone he deems available, and I’m no exception, but he never pushes. He legitimately thinks he’s God’s gift to women and if a woman doesn’t throw themselves at him, they’re not worth his time.

I’m not in the business of placating men or begging to be touched.

Force and aggression are my cup of tea, and this man couldn’t offer me that. He’s the type that will lie back on the bed with his hands clasped behind his head while a woman works hard to get him off. There would be no choking or harsh touching.

He’s more of thegood girl, you’re doing a great jobsort, whereas I need to be called filthy names and have my head pushed down on a dick.

I smile back at the man, doing my best not to let thoughts of Angel and what happened earlier seep in.

“I’ve been busy,” I tell him, knowing he’s as unlikely to ask what I’ve been up to as I am to ask what he does while working.

“We’ve been worried about you. Didn’t know if that guy—”

“I haven’t seen him since he dropped me off that night,” I lie, instead of challenging him about his worry.

No one has called my cell phone or sent a text asking if I’m okay. He’s placating me. Actions and words are two very different things.

He nods, his eyes searching mine for a long moment before Drake sets two pitchers of beer in front of him.

“You’re more than welcome to join us,” he says before walking away.

I don’t have a real problem with the club. Honestly, if those people want to live in a dream world, let them. I’m not shocked that Thumper ended up there. He was never as dangerous as I tried to convince myself he was. He was always checking in, pulling his hands back before he could do much damage. He’s the man that made me realize I had to seek out men that honestly did hate me instead of just pretending. I’m pretty sure that new woman of his wouldn’t appreciate knowing he was paramount in my decision to go undercover in sex trafficking circles.

Two men sitting a little further down the bar draw my attention. I’m able to listen in on their conversation without them knowing, and it makes me want to laugh.

They’re both trying to hype the other up to come speak to me, something they’d probably never have the courage to do if it weren’t for the alcohol they’ve been drinking.

Maybe some women would be impressed, but that’s the opposite way I feel when the teasing they’re doing to each other turns sexual. I doubt either of them could even find the clit despite one’s declaration to being able tomake me scream his name.

This is exactly what I mean by little dick energy. A man who knows how to please a woman, even in the traditional sense—which is never something I’m looking for—doesn’t have to convince himself that approaching a woman he’s interested in is a good idea.

He walks up and takes his shot.

This is something I can give the men in Cerberus kudos for. They don’t waver. They don’t second-guess. They are the ultimate definition of big dick energy.


Tags: Marie James Romance