In a romantic comedy, this would be the moment we share our first kiss. It’s the perfect setting—magical. But that’s not what either of us wants. Or what weshouldwant.I lean forward to touch my nose to hers instead and reduce the intensity of the moment, but it backfires when her breath hitches.Ah!I control my breathing, nuzzling her nose with my own before pulling away and bopping the same spot with my finger. She giggles, actually giggles, and it’s a truly beautiful sound. Something I fear I’ll never forget.
Yep, that might have been our moment. Our one chance to take it further, and I’m not disappointed that we didn’t. Despite my obvious and completely inappropriate attraction to her, there is something about her that makes me want to be her friend. Something tells me she needs more of them.
“We better get back to the group, or someone will think we disappeared to have sex,” she says, and I laugh.
“That would suck. All the accusations without the pleasure.” She returns my laugh, and I relax.
We quickly dress and walk back in silence before each slipping into our tents. I’m a little thrown by what just happened.I didn’t kiss her.I decided to be her friend.I don’t really have girls who are friends. Maybe I’m growing?Or maybe I just need her around?
Gemma rolls over, pulling me from my thoughts of the girl that isn’t her, and I hate myself a little for what happened tonight. But I can’t regret it.
Once again, I find myself wide awake, and it has nothing to do with the uncomfortable blow-up mattress I’m lying on.What did I do last time? That’s right—nursery rhymes. I wonder if that will work again. Twinkle, twinkle…
A groan interrupts my song.
What the fuck?You’ve got to be kidding me. Why the fuck did we set up the tents so close together? We have this entire place to ourselves.
The moans get a little louder but are slightly muffled. I’m hoping that means Nate bit down on something to keep himself quiet so that I don’t have to cover my ears. Not waiting to find out, I move to cover them just in case and rush to lift the pillow out from under my head, but it’s too late. I can’t take back what I hear next.
“God, Summer.”
Some part of me sinks.Not Nate and Cory then.
“Shh!” Summer giggles, and they both fall silent. I shove the pillow hard over my face and crush my head into the mattress. At least that answers any question from earlier—they are definitely not silent lovers, and I’m not at all happy about it.I’m screwed.
Chapter Nine
Dylan
I’mdraggingmyfeetat practice Monday morning. After spending the weekend camping, I would have preferred a sleep-in, but here we are. The guys are all discussing their recent hookups as we walk toward the locker room. My eyes find Nate’s and we both shake our heads, neither of us interested in the team’s version of gossip. Keeping my head down, I hold my breath until I reach the locker room, praying that no one will try and bring me into the chat. Pushing open the door, I beeline for my stuff. Resting both palms on the bench seat in front of me, I lean forward and stare into space with a sigh.I love these guys, but it seems like they have the same routine over and over. Another weekend, another Ball House party. I’m happy to have a few guys interested in other things, like camping.
The guys are still talking in the hall so I relax a little with the peace, my mind going to Summer. We spent the rest of the weekend acting like nothing had happened, but something had definitely changed between us. I felt it, and I know she did too, but we both ignored it, each for our own reasons. When it was time to depart the campsite, we exchanged a wave and a smile. And as Nate’s car pulled away, a lump had formed in the pit of my stomach at the thought of that being our goodbye.
A phone buzzing on the bench near my hand causes me to abandon my thoughts. A picture of Cory lights up the screen.Nate’s phone then. Without hesitation, I answer. Holding the phone in front of my face, I’m greeted with a very shocked Cory.
“Dylan?” She gasps and moves the phone closer to her face. “What if I was naked?”
“Hello to you too. Are you naked?” I ask and pretend to peer down at her body through the phone. She’s not naked. I can see the top on her shoulders, but the strapsdolook lacy.Natey, Natey. Good for you.A pink tinge floods Cory’s cheeks, and I regret my comment. I save her from further embarrassment and move on. “Nate’s still coming in, shouldn’t be long.” The door opens and I spot him through the gap. Getting his attention, I wave him in.
“Thanks, Dylan,” Cory breathes out. Her shoulders drop slightly at my change of subject, but she’s still not completely comfortable. I really enjoyed getting to know her over the weekend. She’s a lot of fun but can be a little shy at times. And that’s definitely present now.
Offering her a warm smile, I ask the first thing that pops into my head to pass the time as we wait for Nate. “Where’s my bestie today?” I laugh at my joke, but the joke’s about to be on me.
Her eyebrows rise in question. “Don’t you mean my bestie?” she asks.
“Nope, I meant what I said.” I shrug, and she laughs, visibly relaxing.
“Ifyouwere really her bestie,you’dknow she’s still asleep after a big night,” she sasses and laughs again, completely unaware of the unpleasant feelings her words have just conjured. I try hard not to react, but a slight cringe escapes me.Does that mean what I think it means?Luckily, Nate arrives so I don’t have to respond.
“Ah, here he is,” I say with a fake smile and pass the phone to Nate. No longer on screen, I close my eyes and take a deep breath, my reaction confirming exactly what I need to do. When I look up, I see Nate eyeing me curiously.Guess I didn’t hide that as well as I thought.My lips pull into a half smile as I turn back to my locker without giving him a chance to question me. My mind drifts back to Summer and the serious decision I have to make. It’s then I realize I’ve already made my decision. I just need to go through with it.
On Tuesday evening, Joel and I are sitting in the living room in the same positions we’ve been in for hours. Joel is slouched back on the couch with his arms behind his head, and I’m in our giant beanbag, feet crossed, kicking back. It’s been an easy day after a hellish night. Yesterday, I did the right thing and broke up with Gemma. I’ve been debating when to tell Joel, because I know the second I do that he’s going to analyze the situation. But I can’t hold off forever. We both had classes this morning but spent the rest of the day flicking between different sports, chatting about useless shit, and playing video games. I’ve had so many opportunities to bring this up, and yet I wait until this very moment, when his precious San Francisco Giants are on the screen.He’s going to love me.
“Gemma and I broke up,” I say as he watches the game. His eyes move to mine briefly in acknowledgment and then he turns back to the screen.
“Okay. Why?” he asks but he’s not really focused on me.
“A few reasons. One being that she gave me an ultimatum…”