I swallowed around the growing tightness in my throat. “That’s true.”
Nana would get an idea for a project in her head and do it on her own. More often than not, something would go wrong, and occasionally, she’d get hurt. I exchanged a look with Jake. I’m sure he was remembering the time she tried to change a light bulb herself. Jake had walked in on her having fallen from the ladder. She hadn’t broken anything that time, but it was enough to make us worry.
Ryan watched me with a steady gaze. “You okay?”
I couldn’t look at him because tears pricked the back of my eyes. I didn’t know what I’d do if Nana moved out of this house and sold it. I couldn’t afford to buy it. I just always assumed she’d live here until she died, and she’d pass it on to me.
“You look pale,” Jake added.
“You’re not worried she’s going to move out?” My voice was barely more than a whisper. I didn’t even want to voice the next idea—she’d sell it. Acknowledging the thought made it more of a possibility.
Ryan’s gaze traveled around the room and paused on framed pictures of Jake and me lining the walls. “This is a big house for her. It makes sense she’d want to move to an apartment or assisted living facility eventually.”
Nana had always been so independent, capable. Even when she got injured, she bounced back quickly. She wasn’t one to place limits on herself or say she couldn’t do something. She always seemed so capable. Considering a future where she wasn’t able to navigate this house was upsetting to me.
She was exactly what I needed when my mom walked out. She’d tell me to be sad for a little while, but then I needed to move on. It became easier because Nana and Jake were my constants, not my mother.
The reality I’d been avoiding was staring me in the face. It was a big house for one person. It was a lot to take care of, and she was probably lonely living here by herself.
Nana came into the room, and Ryan rushed to grab the tray of glasses and a large pitcher of freshly squeezed lemonade she was carrying. “Thank you, dear.”
I set the crystal, still warm from my grip, in my purse.
Ryan poured a glass for each of us, saving mine for last.
The cushions compressed as Ryan sat next to me and pressed the cool glass into my hand.
Feeling light-headed, I rested the sweating glass against my forehead, intending to blame it on the unseasonably warm fall day if Nana asked what I was doing.
Jake sat in one of the wingback chairs on either side of the wood fireplace. He spread his legs wide and braced the glass against his thigh. “How’s business at the store?”
I glanced at Nana, then at him. I didn’t want to worry her. “It’s good.”
Jake nodded. “You need any help, you let me know.”
I breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn’t sniffed out my lie. Even before the break-in, business had suffered.
“I still can’t believe someone broke into the store. Nothing like that has ever happened before,” Nana said.
Ryan stiffened next to me. It had been his twelve-year-old son who’d pushed open the door I’d left unlocked. I’d run into him when I returned to grab my forgotten cell phone. We hadn’t told Nana who’d done it, and thankfully, she didn’t read the paper.
It was enough that the incident caused tension between Jake and Ryan.
“What’s the plan?” Ryan asked Nana, effectively changing the subject.
“I’d appreciate it if you could put the boxes in the sewing room. Jake and Hailey can go through them. See what they want to keep.”
I was torn about going through the boxes because I wasn’t sure what I’d find. Would there be something that reminded me of living with my mother? I’d worked so hard to push her out of my mind and not to expect anything from her in the form of support and love.
“We can do that.” Jake stood, setting his glass on the coffee table.
Ryan stood to follow him out of the room, leaving me with Nana.
Nana focused on me. “I know this is hard for you.”
I stayed quiet because I didn’t trust myself to speak. There was a crushing weight on my chest. The fear of giving away her things, seeing the house empty, and selling it to someone else was inconceivable.
“But I can’t stay here forever.” Her voice was soft and filled with understanding.