When is it time to call it quits? I hadn’t given much thought to it until now. My job had never been personal. I just did what I was told. Killing bad guys is what I did, and I cleaned up the mess others left behind. But now, this job has become personal. Evie was personal. I slid my black sweats over my naked body and didn’t bother with a shirt. I made my way down the hall for one more glance at Evie to ease my soul, but this time when I peeked in, she was awake and looking out the window. “Evie,” I called out, startling her. She turned in my direction with her hand over her heart.
“Oh my God, you scared the crap out of me. Give a girl some warning next time. Like knock or something.”
“You were asleep earlier when I checked on you. I just wanted to be sure you were okay before I turned in.”
“I’m just a little on edge. I dreamt someone had broken into the house and was standing over my bed holding a knife. It startled me awake, and I got out of bed to look out the window. I wanted confirmation that nothing was out of place. You know, to make myself feel safe and all. Then you walked in and well.”
I walked further into the room and placed my arms around Evie. As I pulled her close, she shuttered in my arms. “I’m sorry I frightened you.” I kissed the top of her head. “You’re safe in my house. I’ve got state-of-the-art security, and no one would think to look here for you.”
Evie pulled away enough to look up at me. The swelling had gone down around her eye. “I see their faces at night in my dreams—the two men, that is. The ones that did this to me, and I wonder if there will ever be a day I won't.” Tears fell from her eyes. “I don’t want to live in fear.”
This time when I pulled her tight, her arms wrapped around my back, and the sensation of her touch caused a reaction in my body I hadn’t felt for a long time. I quickly released Evie. I couldn’t risk being unable to control my body, more precisely, parts that had a mind of their own. Taking her by the hand, I led her back to her bed. Evie climbed under her covers without hesitation, and I sat next to her. “You don’t have to worry about those men. They will never hurt you again, that I’m positive of.”
“How can you be sure?”
“Because I wouldn’t make a promise to you I couldn’t keep,” I reassured her.
“You killed them didn’t you? You didn’t say it outright when you talked about your line of work, but I’m not stupid. If someone wants to hurt you, it’s because you hurt someone else. Am I right?”
I hadn’t wanted to have this conversation. Hell, I had never planned to come face to face with her again. But I did and maybe being honest with her, she’ll not want anything to do with me after this is over. “Yes.” I nodded. “I kill people for the government.”
I could tell Evie was thinking about how she felt about my proclamation. After a few seconds she spoke. “Will you stay with me? I’m not sure I can get back to bed if I’m alone. Just till I fall asleep again.”
I wanted to sayhell no,but her honey brown eyes burned straight into my heart. I could see the desperation in them as she waited for my answer. Those eyes pleaded with me to give her a yes. “Just till you fall asleep.”
Chapter Twelve
Truth or Consequences
I woketo a snoring angel beside me. I hadn’t planned to fall asleep before she did, but I did. The last thing I remember was Hugh Jackman wearing a red jacket and a black top hat singing about the greatest show. Musicals just aren’t my thing. But for Evie, I’d do anything she asked. Tossing the blanket I’d covered myself with to the side, I climbed out of bed before she woke and realized I’d spent the whole night with her. Every time I looked into her eyes I saw what she didn’t want me to see. The feelings she still had. Feelings for me, even after all these years. The worst part, I still loved her. I never stopped.
The aroma of coffee brewing filled the kitchen. As I stood there waiting for it to finish so I could grab a mug, I realized that I couldn’t remember the last time I’d woken up in the morning without a care in the world. Lying next to Evie must have soothed the demons that haunt me. Something no other woman could do—not even Mila.
With my mug of caffeine in hand, I headed outside for some fresh air. There were so many unanswered questions, pieces to a puzzle that didn’t line up, and the shit of it was, my gut told me Sawyer still wasn’t being straight with me. I couldn’t just come out and ask him my questions; I needed evidence to support my suspicions, which required access to his office and files. Something I knew wouldn’t come easy.
“Whatcha doing out here?” Evie’s gentle voice asked.
“Just enjoying a little quiet time to myself,” I replied. She was wearing a white cotton robe, the belt loosely tied around her waist, allowing me a glance at her soft silky skin. My eyes lowered from her chest to her bare feet and then back to her lips. The smirk on her face told me she’d worn the robe this way on purpose.
“You know Max, you didn’t have to jump out of bed just to get away from me. I saw the look on your face as you ran your hand through your hair, panicked that I might wake up and see you in bed with me.” Evie raised a brow, and the corner of her lip turned up. “You didn’t know I was awake, did you?”
I wasn’t sure what to say, so I said nothing. She was a hundred percent right. I panicked, I didn’t want her to read more into the situation than there was.
“Look, Max, I know if this hadn’t happened to me, you’d still be dead as far as I knew.” She lowered her eyes to the ground and took a deep breath. “But,” she smiled, “I know now, and I’m not sure how you will just be able to walk out of my life and ignore me again.”
When I reached for her hand, she eagerly placed hers in mine. A hopeful look filled her eyes, and then I spoke the words I knew would destroy her.
“My beautiful girl, if my life were anything other than what it is, I’d gladly pick up where we left off seventeen years ago. But as I told you several days ago, I can’t have you, and you can’t be a part of my life.” I hung my head and closed my eyes. “I just can’t risk it,” I whispered.
Evie placed her hand on the side of my face and cupped my chin, giving it a nudge until I looked up at her. She lowered herself onto my lap and brushed my hair from my forehead. When she had my attention, she kissed my lips tenderly. “I don’t care what you do. I know you think you’re a monster for the things you’ve done. But to me, you’re my Max. You’d never let anything happen to me. You’re my protector, and one day, I promise you, you’re going to change your mind, and I hope it doesn’t take long because a girl can’t wait forever."
I wanted to tell her to wait. I wanted her to be mine, but we don't always get what we want. I made a choice all those years ago, and now I must stand by that decision, even though I want to give in. It was time for an atmosphere change. Standing, I carried Evie into my house and placed her on the counter in the kitchen. “I’ll make you breakfast; what do you want.”
“You’re a pain in my ass, Max. I’m not hungry.” She held out her arms so I could help her down, and she left the room without saying another word.
Chapter Thirteen
No Fucking Way