Hope looked relieved. “Good. I'm glad. Aggie and I were worried. You never talk about your past, and it seemed like you were running from something. I'm also glad you kind of admitted that you’re not okay, and that you need help.”
It made her feel both cared about and anxious to know that her friends had been talking about her behind her back and worrying and speculating about her past. At the same time, she felt a compulsion to unload the burden of her secrets, and an overwhelming desire to hold tighter to those secrets and never let them slip out. She needed to stop thinking about herself. She didn’t want to think about her past or about Luke Sleigh. “So, when’s Chance going to hurry up and propose?” she asked, diverting the conversation away from herself and onto her friend.
The look Hope shot her clearly screamed that she intended to revisit the topic of Summer’s past at some point, but then a small smile crept onto her face. “Wehavetalked about getting married but only in general terms, nothing specific.”
“You two have been together for three years now.”
“Three and a half,” Hope corrected.
“I hear wedding bells in the near future,” she smiled and tried not to sound jealous. She was so happy for her friend, but it only served to remind her that she was and always would be single.
“I hope so.” Hope giggled. “I’ve already been looking at wedding dresses,” she admitted.
“You are going to be the most beautiful bride.”
“And having you and Aggie standing there with me as my bridesmaids will make the day even better.”
Hope had never known her father, her only sibling had died of a brain aneurism when she was just a child, and her mother had died not long after she went to college. With no family of her own, her friendships were that much more important. Summer understood because it was the same for her. “Chance is probably just planning the perfect way to pop the question,” she said.
“We did talk about buying a house together,” Hope told her. “I pretty much stay at his house every night as it is, so we talked about selling his apartment, and me giving up my rental and buying something together.”
“That sounds great.”
“Yeah, I really want us to move into a house.” Hope paused and leaned in closer. “A couple of weeks ago I thought I might have been pregnant.”
Eyes growing wide, she stared at her friend. “You thought what?”
“I was late, and we don’t always use protection because, well, we’re in a committed relationship, and sometimes Chance gets carried away and we kind of forget. And then I was over a week late and I kind of panicked.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
Hope shrugged. “I was scared. Chance and I have talked about kids, but we never discussed timing. We’re not married, and we don’t even officially live together, and I wasn't sure how he would take the news if I was pregnant. I took a test and thankfully it was negative, but it got me thinking that maybe I might want to have a baby.”
Another wave of loss washed over her. Summer had always dreamed of having children. Had even at one time thought that the timing was right, and she might start trying. But it wasn't to be. And now it never would be. She’d never know what it felt like to have a baby growing inside her, to hold it in her arms for the first time, to see its first smile or hear its first words, to watch it take its first steps and then walk into its first day of school. Sometimes it really hit her that she would spend the rest of her life alone. She was only in her early thirties, which meant she still had a long time left to be alone.
“Summer.”
At the sound of her name, she looked up into sparkling blue eyes, and something inside her melted.
* * * * *
7:57 P.M.
“Summer.”
She lifted her head and looked up at him with her big brown eyes. Her lips parted slightly, and her pink tongue darted out to wet them. “Luke,” she said in a husky whisper.
Something had changed in the way she was looking at him. She was interested in him, he could see it in her eyes, he could feel it coming off her. All that was holding her back was fear, he could see that on her too. It was fear that made her run away when they had bumped into each other on the street, and that had made her so rattled when they saw each other again at Nick and Aggie’s house. He just had to find a way to ease those fears. But first, he had to find out what she was afraid of.
Then Summer’s eyes cleared, and her tone turned irritated. “What are you doing here?”
“Can I sit?” Luke asked, already pulling up a chair.
“Hope and I are having dinner,” she protested, inching her chair further away from his.
“Then I’ll join you for dessert.” He grinned.
“You weren’t invited.” Her pretty features scrunched up into a scowl.