“You’re a good brother.”
I shrug at her comment. I do try to be sometimes, but I must not be the best if Viking can’t even find it in himself to talk to me about some problems he’s dealing with. “I try,” I murmur, ignoring the ping of emotion hitting my chest at the thoughts.
“Well, you are. You’re a pretty great guy, Odin. You’re always looking out for everyone else, but I don’t think many catch on to it.”
“Nah, I just watch their backs; they’d do the same for me. I’ll catch you later, beautiful.”
She blushes, her hand moving from my chest. “All right, see ya.”
As I’m walking out of the kitchen, I swear I hear her mutter, “You have no idea how amazing you really are.”
But I could be wrong. Either way, it doesn’t mean what I’m suddenly wanting it to...she says she loves us all—including me—like a brother, when I want her to think of her feelings toward me as a lover.
It’s another four days before Viking makes it back home, much to the members’ relief, but even then, he doesn’t come to the clubhouse. It’s weird, being at the compound without him here and knowing he’s not on a run or something, but that there’s an issue he’s dealing with. I live here, so I got used to seeing him walk through the entire building each morning with a strong cup of coffee, checking things over. He’s a proud president and treats the compound as a leader should. This isn’t the same feeling as when the brothers go on a run. It feels more like we’re in mourning in a sense. A vital part of the hybrid chapter isn’t here at the top and it’s throwing everyone in the place a little off kilter.
Another week passes, with Odin being distant, but I get it. His brother’s finally home and he wants to be there for him. It must hurt knowing that Viking kept something this significant from him and didn’t seek him out, even when he’d finally hit his own sort of rock bottom. If I’d been in his place, I’d have been upset. I wish I could work it all out for all of them somehow. Unfortunately, I have no idea how to help, besides offer to listen if anyone ever wants to talk about anything.
Waking up today and seeing that dark, steaming pot of coffee already made in the kitchen felt good. I know Viking most likely won’t be his usual self, just yet, but it is no doubt a start in the right direction. He’s had his morning coffee and is here bright and early, so that means he mmust be ready to get back to club business.
I may only be another club slut around here to the members, but I still care about everyone being okay. I don’t want the brothers or their ol’ ladies going through tough times; they’ve seen enough hardships in the past already. They’ve each tasted their own bit of torment and hell, and you’d think it’d all be smooth sailing from here on. Sadly, that’s not a reality when you’re in a motorcycle club or out in the world in general. There’s always something happening it seems. I’ve seen it over the years from hanging around here and it almost makes you feel helpless. They hide most things from me, but I catch glimpses here and there.
Heading through the bar area, I find the President behind the long bar top poking through stuff. It looks like he’s taking stock of everything...he must be busying his mind with random tasks. “Morning,” I make my presence known, not wanting him to think I’m creeping around or anything. I’m sure he’s a bit leery of club whores now, even if I had nothing to do with it.
He glances over, tilting his head in a nod. “Hey, Cherry.”
“Are you hungry or anything? I could make a batch of Princess’s cinnamon rolls. I know all the brothers enjoy them too.”
“Ah, Mom’s recipe…damn, those are good.” His face relaxes, thinking of the sweet icing and cinnamon goodness all mixed together. Princess’s mom, Mona’s recipe calls for adding sweetened cream cheese into the roll mixture. They’re moist and absolutely divine. “I don’t want you to go to the trouble.”
“It’s not, really. I don’t mind.” His face is tan, no doubt from his ride, but his angles are just a touch sharper. If I had to guess, I’d say this man has drunk far too much and eaten far too little during this stressful time.
He nods, writing something on the paper placed on the bar top. Not sure what he wants added. Blaze and Chaos are good about taking care of the bar and the groceries around the club.
“It’s good to have you home, Viking,” I eventually say, not being able to hold back from letting him know in some way that he was missed around here.
His eyes slam shut in a wince. It’s quick, but I still catch it. “Yeah, I’m glad to be back.”
“I know it’s not my business and I’m not trying to piss you off, but there’s a club full of people here that care about you and Princess both. If you ever need an ear or something, I know any of us—especially Odin—would be there for you in an instant.”
He swallows before acknowledging my offer. “I appreciate that.” The massive biker clears his throat before muttering, “I heard Mercy stopped through.”
It’s my turn to nod and swallow thickly at the mention of a woman I’ve grown to not care for immensely. Why as women, do we always blame the other woman rather than the man when shit gets complicated? Not that it matters in my case, as I am and always will be the other woman when it comes to Odin.
“You keep doin’ you,” he continues, “and treating O well. You won’t have shit to worry about where she’s concerned.”
This is the last conversation I ever would’ve expected to have with this man. The club Prez, offering up advice on my own woman and man problems. How weird is this morning going to get?
“You think so?” Not only is it out of place, but it’s also the longest conversation I’ve ever had with Viking, minus the time he’d laid down the law as far as being a whore in his club. That chat was simply about what all was expected and such.
“I’ve known my brother his whole life. He has a soft spot for you and you’re a loyal female. That means something to him. It’s more important than he lets on.”
Biting my bottom lip, I keep my mouth shut, unsure of what on earth to say. Do I flat out admit that I’m in love with Odin? Viking’s the club president and it’d easily be grounds for him to give me the boot. We can fuck the members, but we can’t fall for them or cause drama over it. Those are the first damn rules I agreed to when I was accepted and allowed to become a permanent live in around here.
He takes a drink from his big cup of coffee and I offer up a quick thank you, excusing myself to the kitchen. I know Honey damn sure won’t wake her lazy ass up to make the guys any food or even grab some pastries. I always end up doing it instead, not wanting anyone to go hungry. Sometimes the guys will pick up some donuts or Princess will cook a big spread, like for the holidays and what not. Otherwise, it’s usually me or one of the brothers frying up some eggs and baking biscuits.
Viking’s finally back, so I know he’ll be calling church to catch up on club business with everyone. His President patch was still torn from his cut as well, I noticed. I’m assuming he plans to get that back today also which may end up being interesting. Odin’s fortunate that Viking loves him so much. If that weren’t the circumstance, I could easily see Viking killing him for taking the patch in the first place. Thankfully, I don’t have to worry about anything happening to Odin where Viking is concerned. Not that it’s my place to be concerned anyhow, but I can’t help that my heart worries after the man who’s captured it.
And how on earth did Viking know I’d be upset over Mercy? Did Chaos speak to him? Surely, I would hope not. He knows just as well as I do that me giving my heart to Odin would get me kicked out of the club for good. I can’t stand thinking of losing them all like that.