Once I’m silently crying, he sits on the small sofa with me in his lap, sweetly playing with my hair like he did the night he saw me freak out. The thought of my mother looking so frail is terrifying. She’s always been so stubborn and strong, her only weakness being my father, and now this.
My dad and brother eventually come out of her room and sit on the couch, both with their own tears coating their scruffy faces.
Viking, ever my strength, starts talking. “I can understand why this wasn’t said over the phone, but Princess should have been notified sooner. How can she have time to make peace?” he directs at my father.
“None of us have. My wife’s been sick for a long time, but she’s kept it from her family. She’s always been like that, though when something’s been wrong with her. I came over one night and found her passed out on the kitchen floor. The doctor said by her body and tests that she had probably been there for longer than twenty-four hours. We don’t know if she was out the whole time or not, but he said her body shut down to throw it in protection mode and that if it would have been longer, then she would have most likely passed. That was about two months ago.”
“When you started answering her phone?” I ask quietly.
His defeated gaze meets mine. “Yeah. Then it progressed so rapidly. She told me she could beat it, and she didn’t want either of you to know unless it looked like she wouldn’t make it. The minute she had an ounce of energy, I’d call you and have her leave you messages. This last week’s been the worse; she was in the hospital for most of it. I was hoping she would bounce back, but at this point, there’s no telling. It’s up to her body and the medicine to work together and fight back.”
“She can’t have surgery or something to get it removed?”
“Not until she makes it through this round of medicine. Believe me, honey, I’m on them, calling her doctors daily, leaving messages about her having surgery. I even tried to bribe the doctors with the money I have set aside for you guys. Ares went as far as threatening to kill one surgeon. I had to talk him down and pay the man off. He wasn’t even the right kind of doctor had he gotten the guy to agree eventually. It’s been one giant clusterfuck.”
“So what do we do then?” Sitting up, Viking’s big hands wipe away my tears, always taking care of me.
“We wait and see, but in the meantime, you tell her you love her as much as you can.”
“I can do that.” I nod. “Does she have a nurse that helps out?”
“Yeah, but she doesn’t like anyone seein’ her like that. You know how beautiful your momma’s always been and stubborn. She doesn’t like help when she’s sick.”
“So what happened in there earlier?”
“If she wakes and is going to be sick, she tries to make it on her own instead of saving her energy like we beg her to do.”
“I don’t even know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything, sug’.”
“I’m surprised you’re here so much. Is that why there’s rumors about Ares being President?”
He nods. “Yeah, I uh, I told him that I’ve had to stay away from her long enough, I’m not wasting anymore time.”
“You could have been here the entire time; you made her fall apart every time you left. I was the one behind with her, helping her pull it back together. You didn’t just do it once either; you did it over and over, and she’d be a mess for days, weeks; hell, sometimes for a full month. But now that she’s sick, you want to play hero?” I can’t stop the words tumbling out as my emotions spiral.
“I know. I tried to stay away, but I loved her too much. I’d stay gone for as long as I could handle, but I always came home eventually.”
“Ha. That sounds pathetic; really you had to stay away? Really? We were your family, your wife, and children. We wanted you!”
“I know it, but I couldn’t fucking help it!” His voice increases as his eyes start to dry. “I had to stay away. It wasn’t my choice; it was for your safety after I received threat-amongst threat against you all. I had to keep you safe. I knew if you hated me, you’d stay away from me and no one could get to you. I get it; I fucked up your life. I know that, and I live with it every fucking day. You don’t think I wanted my life?” He points toward my mom’s room, “That woman has owned me since I first laid eyes on her!”
“So what’s different now that you can come right back into everything?”
“My son is grown and has brothers that will help him if needed. My beautiful daughter is the Ol’ Lady of the President of an MC club, who’d blow up half the fucking country to find her. You’re both safe,finally. If they come for me, well they can have my life. I only care about my wife being alive and healthy and my children.”
“Look, Dad, I want to believe you, I really do. I promise to try, okay?” My mother’s sick, she wouldn’t want her family fighting like this. If I have to bite the bullet and back off, I will.
This whole time, I was trying to protect her, and I’d even go to extreme lengths to do it, just like my father did. I only wish that I’d known that I was protecting her against the wrong thing. I was too busy hating my father when I should have been loving my mother.
Thank God, I’ve found a love so strong with Viking because I’m going to need the extra backbone and support when I help my mom kick cancer’s ass. She’s a stubborn Ol’ Lady who leads the pack; in my heart, I know she’ll win, and she’ll finally get her man.
One year later…
“Get more plates!” Iyell toward the main room at Odin.
“Yes, ma’am,” he calls back, using his sweet manners he’s developed over the past year. Viking’s been ruthless about Odin growing into a decent man and not like Jekyll. When we finally have kids of our own, they’re going to be little angels or risk getting ‘the talk’ from Viking all the time. I love his voice, but he can drone on to teenagers, and they hate that shit.