It was hard to say how long she threw her tantrum for but eventually Sir caught her wrists in his big hands.
“That’s enough, little one.”
How had he known? She could’ve gone on and on, railing against him, screaming and hitting him, but she didn’tneedto anymore. No, she was content to collapse against his hard but warm body.
Once he’d relinquished the grip he had on her wrists, he circled his arms around her and held her tight. It took a while for her weeping to die down to the occasional hitching sob, but when it had, he tipped her chin up.
“Are you sorry he’s gone?”
“No.”
“Are you angry at me for not letting you do it yourself?”
She’d like to believe that she’d be able to pull the trigger, slit his jugular, whatever method of demise Sir had chosen, but she knew she wouldn’t have been able to do it.
“No.”
“Are you mad I didn’t tell you before it was done?”
It had been bad enough having Sir be away for a week when she thought he was making some sort of family pilgrimage. It would’ve been way worse knowing what he was actually doing. She would’ve been climbing the walls, or her brain might’ve melted out her ears.
“No.”
“Tell me why you’re so upset.”
Annoying as it was, she always felt cleaner, clearer after a good crying jag and this time was no different. The overwhelming wave was gone and she could sort out some of the torrent of emotions. Sheknewwhy she was so angry at him.
“You could’ve gotten hurt. He could’ve killed you. You could have gotten caught, you still could. And he wasn’t worth it. Did you think about how I’d feel if something had happened to you? What I’ll do if you go to prison? I would rather have you with me and him still skulking around every corner than live without you.”
Sir looked at her, grey eyes piercing as always. He didn’t say much, her Sir, but with looks like that he didn’t have to.
“You’re right. He isn’t worth it. He isn’t worth my life, he isn’t worth being taken away from you. But you know what he is worth to me? Your safety, your peace of mind, your happiness, your life.”
For all that he didn’t say much, when he did he was likely to cut her to the quick. If she hadn’t have cried all the tears she had already, she would’ve started blubbering. As things were, she was struck speechless.
Sir stroked a thumb over her cheek and then nudged her chin up a little more in that way that made her suck in a breath and desire run through her.
“Everything is fine, no one is going to miss him, Taj and his people are the best in the business and they took care of all the clean-up and details. I’ll burn this shirt when we’re through. So no worries allowed, little one. It’s done now and I’d do it again, no regrets. Understood?”
And what could she say to that but “Yes, Sir”?
Chapter Five
Ryker
Cosima finished undressing him, and he had her hand him his belt when she was through.
“Palms against the wall,” he ordered, and loved how she obeyed without a second of hesitation, without question. She trusted him.
“Looks like your daddy and your papa have taken it easy on you while I’ve been away.”
His observation was met by a slightly exasperated “Yes, Sir,” which made the corner of his mouth turn up. His funny little masochist. Being with her could be like threading a needle, finding pain that was enough to light her up, make her pant and crave him but not pushing her too far. Today he thought she’d be happy with quite a lot and he was itching to give her plenty. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said he missed her.
Not just because of how they fit together when they played but also the sweet way she’d sometimes come into his office and curl up at his feet, or settle on the floor when he sat on the couch and leaned her head against his knee. Missed too the way she’d untie his shoes and pull them off his feet, and the sounds of his family goofing around even if he didn’t join in.
But right now it was about this particular way they communicated, their specific love language, how they danced and tuned themselves to each other.
He draped the doubled-over belt over her neck so she could think about it while he warmed her up with a hand spanking, making sure her skin was a nice even bright pink from just below her tailbone to the tops of her thighs before he grabbed the leather and started in on her.