“That’s some strong voodoo,” I reply, returning to my seat. “I feel good as new.”
She smiles, resuming eating. “Look on the bright side.”
“Your nipple has magic powers?”
“If your parents hadn’t left you in the woods, my dad wouldn’t have found you on the roadside and brought you home. We wouldn’t have grown up together and I wouldn’t have a roommate who makes me cocoa with marshmallows when I’ve got period pains punching me in the gut.”
“You only kept me around to help you cheat on tests.”
“Not just that. You make it easier to play Battleships too. Not as much fun on your own.”
“I’m glad I was there to help.”
“Hey, I helped you learn to clean your teeth and use sex toys. Not at the same time, I should add.”
“Isn’t that the whole point of an electric toothbrush?”
“See, you are dirty at heart. How come you can be sharp as a tack with me and yet sharp as a brick on dates?”
“Maybe I’m hoping someone will find my intense awkwardness attractive?”
“Sure you will. You just need a hand. Give me your phone.”
I unlock it and hand it over. Her fingers move like lightning over the keys.
While she’s working, I look around me. The hot guy who walked past is looking at me. I look away. “Maybe you’re right,” I tell Maisie.
“Always,” she replies. “About what?”
“Maybe telling that guy I’m a gaylien isn’t the best way to get a lifelong partner.”
“Told you.”
“Hell, I don’t even need a lifelong partner. Long enough to lose my V card would be a start, I guess. Just so long as they give a shit about me. Is that too much to ask?”
“So go over to him and ask that guy out.”
“Who?”
“The guy you keep looking at.”
I get to my feet.
“Shit, you going to do it?” she asks, looking shocked.
“I’m going to put something on the jukebox.”
I get to my feet. I’m looking at the hot guy in his booth as I go which is why I trip over someone’s handbag loop and stumble forward. I lose my balance and crash headlong into a giant redwood of a man in an expensive black suit.
He whips his arms out surprisingly fast, catching me in his arms just as I’m about to faceplant him in the crotch.
He lifts me back to my feet. “Thanks,” I say, craning my neck to look up at him. “That was a close one. Another couple of inches and we’d have had to get married”
He looks like he’s about to smile but then he growls, “Be more careful,” he says while holding onto me for a second too long.
I look up into his eyes and it’s like he’s fighting himself. There’s anger there, a real heart-stopping fury. But also a sorrow behind his glinting dark eyes. Is that lust in there too? Is this someone who likes me in this dress?
He looks like he might be about to either hurl me out the window or swoop me up and rip my clothes off my body. For once, I’m speechless. So many contradictions in one expression. Hands that look accustomed to strike, a mouth that looks ready to roar with fury and rage. Red tie that screams danger, like the rest of him. Keep away from me, his clothes and his face are both saying.