“Mickey’s desperate and will do anything to help him. But the only thing he wants is to meet his father.”
“I told you, I’m not his father. I used protection when I was with her.” He scrubbed the side of his face again as if guilt washed over him. “You have to believe me, Sugar. I know I was a shitty husband back then. I loathe myself for it. If I could, I would’ve done things differently.” He sucked in a deep breath. “But…”
“But what?” Storm asked.
“But I don’t regret being with Mick.”
“You don’t?” Storm and I said at the same time.
“No. When I married Laura, it was because she was pregnant with Emilee. I’d gone without a condom that one time and it bound me to her for life. I won’t say it was my biggest mistake because I got my sweet Em. But I fucking hated Laura for trapping me.”
“She trapped you?” Storm and I said at once, again. We looked at each other, then at Justin.
“Yes. Now, don’t go talking shit about my wife.” He looked up at the ceiling. “None of us are without sin. There were things in Laura’s life that made her lie and deceive me. She was desperate and could tell I was the kind of man who would do right by his child.” He pointed at Storm and me. “Don’t breathe a word of this to anyone, especially Em.”
We nodded.
“It would break Emilee’s heart if she knew what her mom had done and why.”
“I promise,” I told him.
“What’s done is done. I married Laura, Emilee was born, and I cheated at will for a couple of years. Before Mick had left, she told me to stop being an asshole to my wife. She said I was a good man and should give my marriage a fair shot. Eventually, I grew to love Laura. She forgave me like I forgave her. No regrets.”
“No regrets.” I turned his words over in my head. “Not even about Mickey.”
“Especially not about Mick. I loved her. She was the first woman I didn’t want to leave in the middle of the night. She was the only woman I could never forget. If she hadn’t left when she did, I probably would’ve divorced Laura to be with her.” He hung his head like the words leaving his lips pained him. “In the end, it all worked out as it should.”
“But you sound like she was the one.” I couldn’t wrap my brain around any of this. To feel so strongly for another person and just let them go the way Justin had made no sense to me.
Art’s handsome face flashed behind my eyes.No, Eve. That’s different. You’re both free to be together.
But I wasn’t really free, was I?
What was going on between Art and me was nothing like Justin and Mickey. It should be easier for me to walk away from Art. I shouldn’t even think twice about it.
“I thought Mick was the one. If Laura and Emilee hadn’t been in the picture, I would’ve claimed Mick and made her my wife, by choice, not by obligation.” His face fell slack. “I should’ve reached out to her a couple of years after Laura died. I’d thought about it several times over the years.”
“Why didn’t you?” I asked. Mickey had said the same thing, but she’d figured Justin had forgotten her.
“I didn’t want to disrupt her life. I was afraid she’d reject me after everything.”
“She thinks you never really cared about her.” I wanted him to know the truth so he’d know Mickey’s heart was fragile if he chose to contact her.
Justin screwed up his face. “What? I told her I loved her, told her she was the only woman I loved. But she wanted me to fix my marriage.”
“Because she didn’t want to be the other woman or a homewrecker. You could’ve made a different choice, especially after Laura died.”
All this talk of death hurt too much. I’d had a lot of loss in my life. My mom had been killed by a drunk driver when I was a little girl, then my little brother Johnny overdosed his senior year of high school. But losing Matt to colon cancer had been the worst.
To be widowed at the age of thirty-five with twin thirteen-year-olds nearly destroyed me. I never wanted to go through losing another loved one again. It was why I’d encouraged Markey to follow his own path away from the club. I prayed every night for the good Lord to protect Maddox, Storm, and all the other members, including Art. The MC life was gritty and dangerous. Death was part of the life I’d chosen when I fell in love with Matt.
“What about the other guy? Who was he?” Justin’s question tugged me out of my thoughts. “I can’t believe she’d been with someone else while she was with me. I thought she loved me.” He looked hurt.
“I don’t know the details of why she’d been with someone else. That’s for you and her to discuss.” I inhaled a deep breath, my vision blurring. “The other guy was my little brother Johnny.” A tear rolled down my cheek.
“Sugar, I’m so sorry.” Storm launched out of his chair and tugged me out of mine to hug me. “Why didn’t you tell me this sooner?”
I buried my face in his chest. “It’s not easy to talk about.”