I sighed. “I’ll tell you how. Danny—I mean Dodge.” I rolled my eyes in frustration.Call him Dodge in public, Em.
The girls snickered.
“Dodge gives me strength. His love and support are all I need.” If I didn’t have him, I’d be curled in a ball, crying my eyes out.
“He loves you so much,” Maddy said. “He’d pretty much cut himself off from everyone. Oh, was he furious with his brothers for not backing him.”
“Really?” This I did not know. Of course I’d hoped he hadn’t moved on without me and was as miserable as me. But furious at his MC brothers? It never occurred to me that they might’ve had a part in keeping him from coming after me.
Sugar and Tina nodded in agreement.
“You guys have no idea how angry I’ve been. Yesterday morning, I woke up hating Justin. Had been hating him the entire time but more so when Tami came into the picture.” I shivered with disgust.
“Who’s Tami?” Maddy asked.
“His witch of a girlfriend. He totally changed when he got with her. I knew she was bad news. Alarms went off whenever she was around, which was all the damn time. Once, she even held a gun to my back when I was trying to come back here.”
Maddy gasped. Sugar and Tina’s eyes went wide.
“Yeah, shocking, right? Justin thanked her for stopping me. Like why in the hell would she be at my school with a gun? Did he care? No. I honestly don’t know him anymore.”
Maddy covered her mouth. “Oh, Em, that sounds horrible.”
“It was so bad that I wouldn’t let him hold Dante. Not in the hospital or when he took us home. I didn’t trust him and especially not Tami.” My mother’s instinct had been spot on.
“Not holding the baby must have broken Justin’s heart.” Tina made a sad face. “I’m certain everything he did was out of love.”
Sugar nodded. “I agree. Your dad loves you, Em. He just went off his rocker for a while.”
“For a while?” I raised my voice. “For almost a year, I was a prisoner. I wasn’t allowed to have friends, leave the house, or call either of you.” I cuddled Dante to my chest. I hated myself for allowing Justin to control me.
Tina teared up. “Oh, honey. My heart hurts for all you’ve been through.”
“I needed you all during my pregnancy. I had no one but strangers with me when I gave birth.” I choked back a sob, feeling myself unraveling. “I was so scared. I needed Danny… Dodge, Danny… dammit.”
My heart palpitated again. My hands trembled, my throat closing. I was losing it in front of my friends, strong women whom I admired. They’d weathered shit worse than me. I stood, bracing a hand on the table, trying to draw in a good breath.
“Sugar, get Dodge. She’s having a panic attack,” Tina told her.
Sugar ran out.
I clutched my chest. “I can’t—” I gasped, my arms growing weaker by the second. Dante felt like he’d gained fifty pounds.
“I’ll get a paper bag in case she’s hyperventilating.” Maddy rushed to a drawer in the kitchen.
Tina came to my side. “Slow breaths, honey. Can I hold him?” She reached for Dante. “Slow in, slow out.”
I let her take my baby just as Danny ran in.
“Em, it’s okay. I’m here.” He helped me sit.
Maddy passed him a bag. “Here, for her to breathe into.”
He put the paper to my mouth. I inhaled and slowly exhaled. In and out, in and out. It helped, but it was Danny holding my hand and his concerned yet loving eyes soothing me most.
“As soon as you’re better, I’m taking you back to our place, okay?” He kissed my hand. “It’s been a long day, baby.”
I nodded. Each breath I took in was better than the previous.