“You’re sweet.” She pecked my lips. See? Tara was fucking strong. “You can’t tell anyone this, Hero. Maddy doesn’t know any of it. When we met in college, I was in a good place. I’d dealt with my demons.” She pressed her face into my chest and breathed me in. “Her light kept the darkness at bay.”
“Jesus,mi vida. I hate that this happened to you.” I’d rather die than harm my child or let someone else hurt them. How could anyone be so cruel? “Tell me how to help you. I’ll do anything, baby.”
She pressed her warm lips to my chest, brushing her nose across my skin. “It’d been years since I burned myself.”
“And it was because of me that you did it again.” My fucking heart wilted. To be the reason she hurt herself gutted me.
“Not entirely.” She lifted her chin. “I was weak. I let myself spiral instead of fighting through the pain I felt. I own my shit, Hero. It’s not your fault.”
Bullshit, I’d broken my Roja. She didn’t need to shoulder the blame. If I’d been honest with her. If only I’d dealt with the guilt regarding my wife and son. If I’d put them to rest once and for all, Tara wouldn’t have burned herself. My Roja wouldn’t have broken.
I touched my forehead to hers. “I’m so sorry.”
“Burning myself is the least of my worries. My scars will heal and fade.”
“You’re the strongest woman I know.” I’d seen her strength with my own eyes during the clusterfuck with the Dirty Hunters. I’d also seen her heart shatter for Madeline over and over. If my Roja could’ve traded herself for her bestie, she would’ve. I fucking would’ve hated it, but I respected the shit out of her protective, selfless nature.
“I’m not, Hero. I’m scared… Terrified, actually.” Her grip on my arms tightened as terror blanketed her face.
“Why?”
“My… my dad called me.” She trembled under me. “I hadn’t spoken to him in eleven years when he left. I never thought I’d see Paul Walsh again.” Her arms wrapped around me, pulling me close. “I thought he was dead… wished he was.”
After what he’d done to her, she had every right to hate him.Paul Walsh, I’d remember his name and have Grizzly check into him.
“I must sound like a horrible daughter, but he’s not right in the head. Drugs screwed him up. He called himself the Wizard. I was his little Dorothy.” She touched her head. “Because of my red hair. When he burned me, he hummed like it was a game. I had a lonely childhood. I was so thirsty for attention, even the kind that hurt.” Her eyes turned into pools of melted chocolate.
“Fuck, Roja.” I kissed her lips as I teared up, my heart hemorrhaging over her suffering. “I won’t let him or anyone else hurt you. I’m moving you to the compound with me.”
“No, I’m not ready for that. Not after what happened the last time.”
“I’m claiming you. You belong with me.”
“You keep saying that, but I’m scared, Hero. I need more time.”
This attitude from her was the result of my dropping off the planet for a month. I screwed up big time. Fuck, it pissed me off. I wouldn’t let anything or anyone come between my woman and me ever again.
I lightly touched my lips to hers. “Baby—”
“Not another word about it, big guy. I’m not moving in with you…yet. But you’re welcome to stay here with me.” Her intense brown depths watched for my reactions.
“Okay, I’ll stay here.”
She smiled, grabbing each one of my ass cheeks in her hands. “Perfect, now fuck me. I need to leave for work in an hour.”
“Is that all you wanted to tell me? I thought there was more.” I really needed to tell her about Monica and my son and that they were the reason I’d taken off, but I came back for her. Then that fucking Sonny planted the weed on me, screwing everything up. After everything she shared, the time didn’t seem right to get into all that.
“That’s all I want to tell you. If we’re going to be together, I don’t want to hide my past from you. But what I tell you is between you and me. Got it?”
“Got it. Andmi vida, we are together.”
“Then give your woman a mind-blowing orgasm because I’ve been stressed to the max for far too long.”
“Sure you can’t spend the day with me?” I wanted nothing more than to pin her to the bed with my body and make up for the time we lost.
“Sorry. No dice.” She flashed me a broad smile. “Now get to the fucking.”
I grinned, wiggling my eyebrows. My dick was still lodged inside her warmth, so I started fuckingmywoman. I smashed my lips to hers, thrusting my hips firmly to take us both over the edge. After the first time I fucked Tara, I learned how quickly she went off—zero to sixty in less than ten seconds.