“Nope. It was a long time ago. I’m sure there was some fumbling.” I would burn in hell for all the lying I’d done throughout my life. There wasn’t any fumbling. Not with an experienced man of twenty-four. Yes, a man. My dad’s dealer. Sex with me was payment for daddy’s next fix. It wasn’t a violent experience. I’d been crushing on Keith. Liked how he’d touch my red hair. He’d given me something to calm my nerves. He made it good for me. But could sex really be good for a twelve year old?
“How long ago? Because girl, I don’t believe you forgot.”
Copper’s question jerked me back to the present. “We shouldn’t be talking about this. Hero wouldn’t like it.” Yeah, right. He wouldn’t care. I only threw the bastard’s name out there just to get this convo to end.
“Damn, you’re right.” He returned his attention to Luna.
Suddenly I felt hungry. Food hadn’t been at the top of my to-do list the last few weeks. Tequila and vodka? Absolutely. Maybe popcorn to go with it. It was a great way to lose ten pounds if I’d need to drop some weight.
Too bad I didn’t need that. Now, I looked sickly underneath my clothes. I’d been sporting bulky sweaters and sweatshirts so no one would notice. Thank God, the dress I’d worn for Madeline and Storm’s wedding was long sleeved and floor-length. She would lose her mind if she knew the mental state I was in and hadn’t been eating—all the more reason to get control of myself.
I smiled at Copper lying on my living room floor with Luna crawling on his chest. “Hey, do you want to order a pizza?”
Confusion skirted across his face. “Uh… I should probably get outside.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m supposed to be guarding you.”
I rolled my eyes. “And you are. Inside my house.”
He shook his head. “That’s not how it works.”
Not how it works?
Honestly, the way the prospects followed Storm’s orders drove me nuts. It was like they were under his spell or something. They were free men. Free to do whatever the hell they wanted.
“Bullshit. I don’t need a guard. So if you’re here, you can be inside my house. Plus, you need to eat.”
“I’ll eat when I get back to the club.” He moved Luna’s tail away from his nose. His thick eyebrow arched as he watched me.
“Or you can eat with me.” I flashed him my best endearing smile. “Please. It sucks eating alone.”
“Come back to the clubhouse. I liked having you there.”
“No.”
He raised up on his elbows. “You won’t be alone there.”
“I’m not alone here. I have you and Luna.”
“Madeline’s worried about you. She misses you. You can have your old room back.”
“For Christ’s sake, Copper! I don’t want to be there, okay? I’m not part of the club.” My heart raced, my stomach knotting up. He was making me think about Hero again, and I didn’t want to.
“You’re Madeline’s best friend. That makes you family.”
“Why would I want to be there, after—” I snapped my mouth shut before I embarrassed myself.
“After what? If this is about Hero, he—”
I raised my hand. “No. I don’t want to talk about him. Just… get out.” My hands shook at my sides. Shit, I was losing it. I needed Copper out of my house, stat. “Go straddle your hog. Go stand your post. Just go. I really don’t want you here at all. You’re fired!”
Copper bolted to his feet, holding Luna in one hand. “What the hell, Tara? You’re talking nonsense. And you can’t fire me.”
“Bullcrap.” I went to the door and opened it. “Get. Out,” I told him as calmly as possible regardless of my heart thudding viciously in my chest. It hadn’t been this bad in years. Since before I met Maddy.
“Storm calls the shots. He won’t agree.”