“My car is not a death trap,” I said. “Just because my driving scares you doesn’t make it deadly.”
“Mm, nope, I think it’s pretty deadly.” She pursed her lips, waving me away. “Go shop or something, would you? Give me and Jess a chance to get to know each other.”
I innocently held up my hands as I backed away. If there was one thing Julia couldn’t resist, it was a hot girl. She kept talking as I roamed among the shelves, explaining how we all knew each other. She and Lucas used to work together when this place was still a tire shop; she was the only coworker of his that he hadn’t completely hated. She’d been a student at Wickeston High, but a grade above the rest of us, although she ran in some of the same circles. We ended up at a lot of the same parties as a result, including the club I bartend for.
“I remember you from the cheerleading team!” Julia exclaimed, practically squealing in her excitement. “I always saw you at the football games. Girl, you wereamazing. Like holy shit, I could never be that flexible.”
I got a quick glimpse of Jess’s face as I passed by and was pleased to see her smiling. Most of our friends weren’t people that Jess was familiar with, but they were people she could trust.
She needed people like that. People who weren’t going to tear her down behind her back, who didn’t make adhering to a strict mold one of the caveats of friendship. As much as it pissed me off, finding Jess abandoned in our garage by her so-calledfriends had made me sad more than anything. She clung to those people because they were familiar, not because they actually did anything for her life.
I used to try to make everyone I met into a friend, regardless of who they were or how they’d treated me. I’d convinced myself that enough kindness could turn anything around, but not everyone was — or deserved to be — a friend. Learning that lesson hadn’t been easy, but painfully necessary.
I smirked as I picked up a pair of nipple clamps and tucked them under my arm. Jason didn’t know exactly how Lucas was planning to thank him, and I was glad Julia was keeping Jess busy. I planned to have her arrive at our house with a whole box of goodies, like a doll that came with accessories. It tickled my humor to imagine not only Jason being surprised by Jess, but Jess being surprised by what exactly she was in for.
Jason had certain kinks he didn’t often get to indulge and I was eager to give him the opportunity. But I grabbed a few items for myself too; I wasn’t going to miss the chance to play when I finally had Jess all to myself.
“I think that’s everything,” I said, setting my basket down on the counter for Julia to ring up. I slid myself in front of it before Jess could get much of a look. “No peeking now. That would ruin the surprise.”
Jess scowled at me, screwing up her mouth to protest, but Julia howled excitedly, “Ooh, yes, girl, keep it a surprise!” She leaned around me, lifting her eyebrows in a cartoonishly pervy way. “Trust me, you’re going to have fun.”
“Hm, we’ll see about that,” Jess said, although the skepticism in her tone softened jokingly. Julia rang us up and was handing my card back when the jingle of the doorbell caught her attention.
“Sorry, guys. Duty calls.” She lifted her hand and gave the same enthusiastic greeting to the overwhelmed-looking couple who’dwalked in, then lowered her voice and said, “Ooh, I think I’ve got some first-timers. They’ll either freak out and bail or buy the whole shop. Time to work some magic! I’ll see you around!”
Jess’s stomach was rumbling as we left the shop, although she tried to deny it. But there was a fast-food place right across the street, and the smell of grilled onions and greasy burgers drew me. We took a table outside to eat, the striped umbrella overhead shielding us from the sun.
Jess inhaled her burger before I’d eaten even half of mine.
“I had a hard workout this morning,” she said, when she noticed me eyeing her empty tray. “And I had a small breakfast —”
“Chill, girl.” I chuckled as I poked a handful of fries at her. “Who the hell taught you that you need to justify what you eat?”
She stared at me for a moment before she stammered out, “Oh, uh, my mom, I guess. She’s always been picky about food.”
“That’s not being picky, it’s being invasive. It’s no one’s damn business what you eat, as long as you’re eating.” She smiled, reaching across the table and grabbing some of my fries. “There you go. Steal as much as you want.”
Her smile widened and she pulled her legs up to sit cross-legged on the red plastic seat. There was such a difference between the way she smiled in public — at parties, with her friends, her peers — than she did here, with me. This smile was far more open. It was honest rather than a carefully formulated expression. I liked that. I wanted to see it more.
I wanted to see every expression she had, as raw as I could get it.
I had a view of the parking lot from my seat, so I saw the old red Chevy as soon as it pulled in. It was loud, puttering as if it had an exhaust leak, and my eyes followed it, although I didn’t thinkmuch of it. It parked crooked and the engine cut off, but I was already looking at Jess again when the driver stepped out.
I didn’t see him clearly until he was passing by our table. Then I glanced up, and nearly fucking choked on a mouthful of burger.
“Woah, are you okay?” Jess reached across the table for me as I coughed, managing to choke the food down despite my sputtering. I paused as I caught my breath. Jess’s eyes were wide as she looked at me. But then her gaze flickered up, over my shoulder, and she gave an awkward smile as she said to someone, “He’s okay.”
Shit. Fucking shit.
I glanced back in time to make brief eye contact with the man who’d stepped out of the truck. He was old, with a long lean frame and gray stubble on his cheeks. His hair was greasy and grown out to his shoulders, but beyond his haggard appearance was a stunning familiarity that made the food in my stomach turn sour.
His mouth twitched in a crooked smile before he turned away and kept walking. He recognized me; I’d seen it in his eyes.
I hurriedly gathered what remained of my food, setting my tray on top of Jess’s empty one. “Come on. We need to go.”
Jess blinked at me in surprise but followed me as I threw our trash away. I grasped her hand before we ran back across the street, looking over my shoulder with paranoia all the while.
He wasn’t supposed to be back. Fuck, he wasn’t even supposed to bealive.