“I did the first thing you asked me to,” she says sweetly, an almost mischievous smile curving her full, soft lips. I can remember all too well how those lips felt wrapped around my cock, and I feel it twitch inside of my sweatpants, aching to escape. Aching for literally anything—her hand, her mouth, her fucking tight pussy, to be wrapped around it so that I can fucking come.
I want her, no, Ineedher, so fucking badly.
“I talked to Max, just like you told me that I should,” she continues, setting the wooden spoon down on the counter and taking a step forward towards the edge of the kitchen. “Are you going to reward me for being a good girl?”
Oh, fuck. Her sweet, innocent voice saying those words rips through me, making me ache in a way that’s almost unbearable. I want to do every single thing those words insinuate. I want to fall to my knees and yank down those tight denim shorts, press my mouth against her pussy and lick her until she screams my name. I want to bend her over the counter and fuck her until she comes again and again, finger her with my cock in her ass until she comes that way too. I want to possess every inch of her body, make her orgasm until I can’t wring another drop of pleasure out of her squirming, sweating, dripping body, and then hold her in my arms until she falls asleep next to me, so that she can wake up beside me and we can do it all over again.
I want her in ways that I hadn’t known it was possible to want a woman, so deeply and fiercely that I feel as if she’s gotten into my very soul, into my blood and bones, so that even if she went back to Manhattan now, I’d never be truly free of her.
But she doesn’t feel the same way about me. She’s still half in love with a man who owned her, who used me to violate her, and that same man was on the phone with me not an hour ago, threatening to come and take her back.
I’m ready to break my entire world apart for a woman that isn’t even mine.
“I need to change.” I back up, turning sharply away from her. My entire body feels flooded with desire, my senses swamped with it, so that I can’t think about anything other than my rigid, aching cock, and how badly I need relief. “I’ll just—”
I don’t even finish the sentence before I’m striding towards my bedroom, my fist clenched around my bag. I shove the door open, moving to slam it behind me and put some distance between myself and her. Still, I feel resistance when I do, and turn to see Ana standing there with her own hand against the door, her face a mixture of confusion and hurt.
“Did I do something wrong?” she asks in a small voice, and when I take a step further into the room, she follows me, closing the door behind her so that we’re suddenly both in my room, the door shut. My huge master suite suddenly feels impossibly small, the air so thick with tension that it’s hard to breathe. I want to throw her up against the door, onto the bed, over it, and it’s taking every last shred of self-control that I have not to do exactly that.
“No,” I tell her, more sharply than I meant to. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just, Ana—I can’t. I can’t keep fucking doing this.” I run a hand through my hair, staring down at her. I feel as if she’s tearing me apart, as if they both are, all of this. The phone call from Alexandre was the last straw, the thing that made me wonder if any of this matters after all, if bringing her here was a mistake, if it was all just a huge fucking mistake. Not saving her, that never could have been, but trying to make a future with her—
“What?” Her voice trembles when she says it, and her eyes widen a little. “Liam, I don’t understand. I—” She takes a step closer, and I back away, dropping my bag to the floor.
“Ana, don’t touch me. I can’t—”
Her eyes go rounder as they flick down to my throbbing cock, and I can see the understanding dawn on her face. But to my surprise, it doesn’t make her back down.
“I want you, Liam,” she whispers. “I did what you asked—”
“This isn’t a game, Ana!” I stare at her, feeling myself starting to almost shake with the effort to hold back, rage and desire and frustration churning through me. “I’m not playing a fucking game with you! I’m not fucking Alexandre. I’m not testing you.”
“Why did you bring me here if you don’t want me?” Her lower lip trembles slightly, her hands clenching at her sides. “Liam, I don’t understand—”
“I do want you!” The words tear out of me, rough and hoarse, my throat tightening with need. She looks so fucking beautiful, standing there in the shorts and tight tank, and I want her so much that it hurts. “I want you, but it’s all fucked up now, and the harder I try to fix it, the more fucked everything gets.” My jaw clenches, my teeth are grinding as I stare at her, willing her to understand. “I had all these fucking hopes for what would happen when I found you, when I rescued you and brought you home, all these fucking ideas. And then Alexandre fucking ruined everything. He bought you, and treated you like a fucking dog, and forced me to hurt you, and some fucked up twisted part of you still loves him anyway.”
I see Ana recoil at those last words, a shudder running through her as she takes a step back, her eyes glistening. “Liam—”
“He ruined everything!” The words rip out of me the same way it feels as if my heart is being ripped to shreds, torn apart by the man who stands between me and the only woman I’ve ever felt this way about. “He destroyed everything there could have been between us from the start, just as he intended. No matter what we do, we can’t ever change that. The first time I was inside of you was fucking rape, because another man made me do it at fucking gunpoint, and I can’t take that back. I can’t undo it, can’t go back and stop him.” I’m shaking now, my fists clenched, rage and hurt shuddering through me as I face off with Ana, all of the emotions welling up at once. “I should have fucking stopped him, and I couldn’t. I came to save you, and I couldn’t. I was fuckinghelplesswhile he made me hurt the woman I love. And now it’s ruined—we’reruined.”
I see the shock cross Ana’s face at the same moment that I realize what I’ve said. “Shit.” My shoulders sag, and I rub my hand over my mouth, the rage suddenly replaced by deep and abiding regret. “I didn’t mean to say it to you like that for the first time, I—”
“Liam—” Her eyes are welling up with tears, her mouth pressed tightly together in a clear effort not to cry. “I’m so sorry, I—I don’t know how to explain it, how to make it better. I don’t know how to make you understand what I felt with him, why—I just—” She gasps, a sob escaping as she wraps her arms around her waist, as if to shield herself from what she’s feeling, from whatI’mfeeling. “I know he broke you. He broke me too. And if it’s all ruined, then—”
The anger leaves me in a rush, the look on her face cracking my heart into pieces all over again. “I’m sorry, Ana.” I step forward, unable to resist the urge to pull her into my arms and comfort her. She feels so delicate in my embrace, almost fragile, and I run my hand over her hair, feeling the silky strands run through my fingers as she lays her head against my chest. I feel her suck in a deep, shuddering breath, and the warmth of her body against mine makes me react all over again, the almost primal desire rising up fierce and hot.
“It’s not your fault,” I murmur. “It’s his. It’s all his fucking fault. I should have killed him—”
“Liam, he—”
“No.” I shake my head, my hands on her upper arms as I push her slightly away from me so that I can look down into her tearful face. “I don’t want to hear about how he’s broken too, about his sad past. I don’t—I don’t care, Ana. Maybe that makes me evil too, in some way, but I don’t give a shit. After what he did to you, to us—‘’
She blinks, looking up at me. “Is there anus?” she asks softly, and the question feels like a knife to my heart.
“I—”
I don’t have a chance to finish what I was going to say before Ana goes up on her tiptoes, her hands pressed against my chest as her lips seek out mine. They feel warm and damp from her tears, and I can taste salt on her skin. The kiss sends a shudder through me, my cock reacting instantly to her nearness, the feeling of her mouth on mine, and I jerk back almost immediately, rock-hard all over again.
The hurt returns to Ana’s face in an instant. “You said if I was a good girl, I could have more.” She whispers it, and I can hear the undercurrent of desire, the need in her voice too. “I want you, Liam—and I can see that you want me too. You can’t hide it.” She reaches out, her fingers running down the length of my cock in my suddenly too-tight sweatpants, and I bite back a groan. Even through the thick fabric, her touch feels way too fucking good.