“Missed what? Doc, what are you saying?”
“I believe you have placenta percreta. It’s a serious, rare condition where the placenta embeds too deeply into the uterine wall. In your case, Lo, I believe the placenta isn’t just invading the muscles of the uterus but is growing through the uterus. Often, in cases like this, the placenta can attach to the nearby organs.”
“What does that mean for our baby?” I ask.
Dr. Ramirez opens her mouth, but before she can speak, Gabe interrupts, “What are the risks to Lo?”
“Well, earlier than twenty weeks we’d typically suggest a termination of the pregnancy. With Lo, I’m going to recommend bed rest, either at home or in hospital if home is not a place you’re able to accomplish that.”
“What are the risks, doctor?” Gabe says through his teeth.
“The condition is very serious, I won’t mince words, Mr. Laurier. But there’s every chance Lo could go on to have as close to normal a pregnancy as anyone else. Though delivery will be an early scheduled C-section, and I’m sorry, Lo.” She gives me atight smile. “But placenta percreta often leads to hemorrhaging after delivery and will likely require the surgical removal of your uterus.”
My heart plummets through my abdomen. Blood roars in my ears and my head spins. “What?”
“The blood loss after delivery is severe, Lo. I’m afraid the only way we can ensure the mother’s best chance of survival is to insist on a hysterectomy.”
“And if we terminate now?”
“Gabe!”
His green eyes cut to mine and his brow furrows. “It’s not what I want, Freckles, but if it’s a choice between you and this baby. I’m going to choose you.”
“Oh my god, are you even hearing what you’re saying?”
“Termination is not something we suggest in the second trimester. In any event, termination won’t deal with the issue at hand as you’ll still need a uterine hysterectomy to prevent the placenta detaching on its own, causing you to hemorrhage. I know this is all very scary for the both of you, but I’m here to help guide you through it.” Dr. Ramirez cleans the transducer and sets it back in the holder, and then she wipes the jelly from my abdomen.
“I’m going to let the two of you talk while you get dressed,” she says. “Lo, you have my number, so if either of you have any questions don’t hesitate to call me. In the meantime, I’m going to write a referral to Doctor Scorsone. She’s head of obstetrics at Sinai, and very well versed in this condition.”
“Thanks.”
“I know this is a lot, and we can schedule an appointment with just the two of us if you’d prefer to talk through the procedures involved.” She shoots an accusatory glance at Gabe. “Just know you’re not alone in this.”
I nod, because I can’t speak. If I open my mouth, I’m not entirely sure I won’t just start screaming and never stop.
“You take it easy over the next few days, yeah?” She looks at Gabe. “Let’s try to keep her stress at a minimum. The last thing we want is undue stress on the baby and your system, Lo.”
I sit up and hang my legs over the edge of the bed, feeling so small, so inadequate. How could this have happened? Did I do something wrong in those first twenty weeks? My god, I’m not even thirty yet and the possibility of having more children has just been ripped out from under me. How can I have a hysterectomy at twenty-nine?
“Lo?” Gabe asks. I glance up and see Doctor Ramirez is gone. It’s just him and me. The father of my unborn child, the only child I’ll ever have, it seems, and the only word I hear when I look at him is, “terminate”.
The numbness I’ve felt in the last ten minutes just dissolves all at once and I crack. Deep harrowing howls come from my throat and lungs, from my gut, and Gabe just stands there with tears in his eyes, looking at me like he hasn’t a clue what to do with me. I guess that makes two of us.
CHAPTER FORTY
Lo
I’m getting ready for work when there’s a sharp rap on the door. I glance toward the bedrooms where Clem is probably still sound asleep after her wild sex fest last night. I really don’t want to answer it, because I have a fair idea it’s Gabe crawling back with his tail between his legs after things became so messy after our appointment. I let out a loud sigh and stalk across the room, pulling back the door with an impatient expression.
“Hi.” He leans against the doorjamb, his hair a ruffled mess, wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday.
“Rough night?” I ask acerbically.
“You could say that.”
I flinch because while he was out getting drunk, I was left here with my feelings and fears ... completely sober. I don’t get to escape this nightmare with pot and hard liquor, and a small part of me resents him for it.
Gabe’s eyes roll over me and he takes in my outfit. “Tell me you’re not going to work.”