“I’ve taken your suggestions into consideration. I’ve incorporated them into my plans—intoourplans.”
“That’s still choosing the Bratva, Pavel!”
I growl with irritation and fly from the couch, pacing the area behind it. “I don’t know what you want from me! I’ve given you everything!”
“Have you?”
My defenses spring to life. Every awful phrase in the book drifts through my skull. I could take a crack at just about anything she’s done and throw it in her face.
It would be justified. It would be sound. It would be a proper tactic to get her back under my control. After everything she’s done, it would even be best for her and the baby to be in such a controlled environment. Her health and safety are my priority—and this is one way to secure them.
Theonlyway.
But if I keep digging my claws into her, then I’m bound to injure her sooner rather than later. What’s worse, I might even unintentionally hurt the baby.
I pause and rest my hands on the back of the couch. I stare through the shadows at my wife—at the person who became my entire life not so long ago—and try to figure out how I can convince her to stay.
But I come up with nothing.
There’s nothing left for me to do.
This might very well be the end.
I look down at the couch. “You’re right.”
She shifts uncomfortably across from me.
“I’ve never put you first.” I whisper it as if I’m afraid to hear the words. “I barged into your world and dragged you into mine.” My frown deepens. “You’ll never know how sorry I am for that, Liya. Truly.”
A moment passes before she stands again. This time, she’s more confident. She tucks her hands into her pockets and nods.
All I can do is nod back.
To upset her more would send her into a defensive zone where she won’t compromise. And it will do the same to me. If I care about her and our child, then I’ll do everything I can to ensure their happiness.
Silence flows through the den. The wind picks up outside, rushing into the side of the safe house repeatedly. I’m about to turn away when Liya steps toward me.
“We should head to bed,” she suggests.
“I agree,rodnaya.”
She flinches at the affectionate name and then heads toward the foyer. She doesn’t pause to wait for me. She doesn’t even look back to see if I’m following.
She might have invited me to bed, but it’s purely out of marital obligation. Nothing more and nothing less.
With a sigh, I drift after her, a specter lost in my own home. I’m making my way up the steps when I hear Liya speak in a soft voice. The words are lost to me. And they don’t quite matter. It’s the tone she’s using that prompts me to pause.
It’s the gentlest way I’ve ever heard her speak. It makes me wonder if I’ll ever hear that voice directed atme—or if I’ll never hear her speak to me in such a voice, a sign that I never deserve her gentleness.
When I reach the landing, I watch her exit the guest room. She pauses for a second before walking past me, wandering through the darkness for the second time in the same night. I don’t flip the light on this time. She seems to prefer moving around in the shadows.
Is this what I’ve done to her?
I brush my teeth, take off my clothes, and climb into bed. She slides under the sheets next to me in her tank top and panties. It’s normal for a moment. It’s our usual routine.
Until she turns away.
The crater in my chest grows wider.