Right now she would rather have his brutal honesty than a smile from a sycophant.
An affair with her enemy was sounding less and less stupid.
* * *
“You aren’t supposed to wear black to weddings.”
Ferro approached Julia at the reception, a glass of champagne in hand. He’d come in just as the ceremony was starting, after doing some business with China.
Julia turned and his stomach tightened, blood rushing hot and fast through his veins. And he felt it, strong and sure, arousal.
“I have permission,” she said, smiling, her teeth a flash of white against the crimson of her lipstick.
Her blond hair was styled in soft waves, the black dress a simple silhouette that clung tight to her hips and flared out like a bell at her knees, falling softly to the ground from there. But it was the neckline, a plunging V in the front and back, that had his attention.
Her breasts were small, but perfectly formed. And he found himself wondering about them to the point of obsession. Was it due to so many years when his own fantasies had to stay locked inside of himself while he catered to others? So many years spent suppressing desire so he didn’t have to deal with past memories? Was that why it was so strong? Or was it simply Julia?
Forbidden fruit. A temptation he never thought he would be vulnerable to.
Because he had been that for other people and there was no satisfaction there for the object of that kind of lust. It was a selfish desire. It used the other party, until there was nothing left of them. Until they were cold inside.
Unless he made it his mission to satisfy her.
No.
He would not do it. He was stained by his past, every penny he’d ever spent, every penny multiplied, coming from his deepest shame. His entire empire had been built on his back, in a near literal sense. He wouldn’t bring it all back. He wouldn’t.
He hated the rumors. That he had seduced wealthy older women out of their fortunes. But he hated the truth more. That he had been their toy. That he had been bought. That his company was built that way. That his legacy was that of a man who had sold cheaply what should only be given.
So he looked away from her figure. Looked at her eyes. Blue. Clear. Reflecting everything he was starting to think she was: innocence. Goodness. All that armor to cover the sweet and vulnerable that was in her.
“Special permission for the wedding’s benefactor?” he asked, handing her the flute of champagne.
She took it, lifted it to her lips, then lowered it. “I’m hardly the benefactor,” she said.
“You paid for everyone’s accommodations. And you also pay the bride’s salary.”
“I don’t give her money for nothing. She’s a darn fine programmer.”
“Do you know all of your employees?”
She shrugged one bare shoulder. “Not all of them. At a company the size of mine, that’s impossible, but then, you know that.”
“I barely know one of mine. Not below a certain tier,” he said.
“How is that possible?”
“I’m not the kind of boss who does walk-throughs of the office and team meetings and wilderness camping trips where we do trust exercises.”
“Oh. I am. I mean, I’ve done those things,” she said.
“Yes, you are a very…you are a nice person.”
“Thank you,” she said. “You say that like you’re surprised.”
“I don’t know very many nice people.”
“Maybe I’m not that nice, Ferro.”
“Why do you say that?”
“I don’t know. I mean, I guess I’m generous. With money. But not with me. Yeah, I walk through the halls of the office building and I tell everyone good game. I come to their wedding and I buy expensive gifts. But money is so easy to give. It’s a lot harder to give you. To give real friendship.”
“You want people to use you for your money,” he said, the words slipping out.
“I never thought of it that way, but I suppose it’s what I earn, since it’s all I give. Still, human nature being the fickle, hypocritical thing it is, I’ve never cared for being used for my money when I was…trying to make a connection.”
“And men do that to you?”
“Yeah. There are a lot of beautiful women in the world, Ferro, much more beautiful than I am. But there are no women with more money than me. So…doesn’t take a genius to figure out why guys are attracted to me, suddenly.”