“Fuck off,” Francis said and Speed could see his incredulous sneer. “I knew since we were kids but I didn’t do shit about it, did I? You’re still fucking breathing, last time I checked. If I scared you into keeping your mouth shut and keeping your business to yourself, that was for your own good.”
“For my own good? Who the fuck were you to tell me what was for my own good? You think that was good? Living like that?”
“That’s why I got you out and this is how you repaid me. You would have been nothin’ without us and I’m taking it all back.”
“Francis…” Speed laughed but it was tinged with fury and bitterness. “You don’t want to do this. I’ve tried to reason with you becausewe arebrothers. You don’t know what I’ve done to protect you. I took a bullet and I risked everything so you could walk away from this.”
“That’s how I knew it was you, Speed. The FBI, the Italians, Coonan’s boys…they would have killed me with Mickey. None of them would have given it a second thought. They would have put a bullet in my head just so they wouldn’t have to see my ugly face again. But you thought you were smart and that you could keep fuckin’ with me.”
“I didn’t want you to die because I fucking love you! Don’t you get it? You got a woman who still loves you and two beautiful daughters but you think you lost everything because an old asshole got what he had comin’ to him.”
“I made sure they’re taken care of and they’re better off without me. And I know better,” Francis scolded, striking Speed’s temper like a match. “You won’t touch them because you’re fuckin’ soft. You always have been and that’s how you fucked this up.”
“You think I’m fucking soft?” Speed laughed. “You have no idea what I’ll do to you if you hurt Blake. You have no idea who I’ll send after you.”
There was an answering laugh from Francis and it was spiteful and ruthless. “Oh, I know all about your friends and who you work for. I heard about Lake Cliff before you built your cozy little love nest there. I knew there was a monster that skins people and makes bodies look like they’ve been in a blender.‘Don’t go near Lake Cliff’is what I heard but I’ve skinned people too and I’ve got nothing left. Send whoever you want after me, you still won’t save your pretty little lover boy,” he promised, bringing tears of terror and frustration to Speed’s eyes. The hand around the phone tightened as Speed held back his rage.
“What do you want, Francis? Tell me how to settle this so Blake doesn’t suffer for what I’ve done.”
“Let’s start with that rosary. You go and fetch it and we’ll see how I’m feeling,” Francis suggested sweetly.
“No, Francis—” Speed started, then stopped when Francis clicked his teeth.
“You just said you don’t want him to suffer but he’s not worth a rosary?”
“It was my mom’s!” Speed cried, unable to control the heaving of his chest as he was swarmed with memories of his mother on her knees at Mass and her strong, work-calloused fingers worrying the beads as she balanced her checkbook. Visions of Lois Eldon’s faith andgoodnessmerged with Mickey’s snarling, demented grin and his thick, careless fingers fondling the rosary like it was a cheap rabbit’s foot from a gas station. “It wasmy mom’sand he never should have taken it!”
“It was Mickey’s longer than it was hers.”
“Because he killed her! Do you hear any of the things you’re saying?”
“Are you hearingme?” Francis asked loudly. “I don’t care about your mom. That was over thirty years ago and it was different then. You and I, we were family andyoufuckedmewhen you killed Mickey. You wouldn’t have anything if it weren’t for me and Mickey. You wouldn’t have been shit, just some poor kid with poor, shitty parents.”
“No. I was always gonna be something because that’s how I’m built but I would have had a real family and I would have loved them so damn much. I still do. I never stopped just because Mickey ripped my life apart.”
“You ungrateful fuck. I should have left you on the street. Mickey gave you a new life and you want to cry about shit that happened when you were a baby. It was war, Speed. Get that fuckin’ rosary and I’ll tell you where to deliver it to.”
“Only if Blake gets to walk away. I want your word.”
“Want in one hand and shit in the other. That’s about all you’ve got to bargain with at the moment. And I know who else you’re friends with and I’m watching. Try to track me or send your hitman after me and I’ll blow up the Corvette with loverboy in it and disappear.”
“Francis—!” Speed bit down on his lips to hold back a torrent of threats and curses. “I don’t have the rosary. I put it somewhere safe back East and it’ll take me a while to get it.”
“I’m not in a hurry but I imagine Blake’s going to get pretty sick of being tied up in that car of his. I bet it’s getting hot in there with that bomb…”
“Come on! He hasnothingto do with this!” Speed cried. “He didn’t even know about you or Mickey until we met and he didn’t want anything to do with the heist or the hit.” Regret roiled within Speed and he was sick. For a moment, he wished he could undo the heist and the hit to save Blake and Speed’s guilt became unbearable. How could he choose Blake over justice for his parents and the rest of Mickey’s victims? He was broken and Speed wished he was in Blake’s place and thathecould blow up and take the whole awful mess with him. “I’ll bring the rosary. Just don’t hurt Blake,” he said, his voice dead with defeat. He’d hand over the rosary and do whatever it took to save Blake but Speed didn’t care about what happened after that.
“Good. I’ll tell you where to find me when you get back but remember: this Corvette’s already gassed up and it’ll take seconds to turn it into an incinerator. I’ll do it if I think this phone feels hot or I think someone’s watching me. Try playing one of your games and I’ll blow Blake up and walk away.”
“Ok!” Speed agreed quickly.
“You know I’m not fucking around. I give a fuck about blowing up some slut or getting rubbed out by a hitman. I didn’t forget that I chose this life and am gonna get whatever I have coming to me. Neither should you.”
With that, the call ended and Speed’s beautiful new life went up in flames. Tears spilled down his face as he turned and took in the horror around him. It was a glittering, shimmering lie that Speed had woven to fool himself. He’d tricked himself into believing he could have everything and he’d lied so spectacularly, he’d made Blake believe in it as well. And just as fast as Speed had cast his spell, it had all come crashing down around him.
“I don’t know what to do.”
The words were so foreign to him and the feeling so utterly disorienting. Speed stumbled to the door and down the front steps on shaking legs. He didn’t know how he was going to save Blake so he went to the only person he could trust.