Viv laughs and takes a long swig of her beer. “Like I believe you. It’s all you talk about.”
I scrunch my face up, mirroring the clench in my gut. “Viv, I’ve been lying to you. I haven’t dated anyone since Alicia. I only dated a couple of people before her.”
Her legs fly off the lounger, feet planted on the decking. “You’re serious?” I nod my head and take a swig of my beer. “Why the hell would you lie about that? It’s like youwantedto look like a jerk.”
“Iwantedto look like I’d changed. That I’d become someone to reckon with. The guy who has it all.” I look my baby sister dead in her face. “But I don’t have it all, Viv. Not without Tori.”
“Excuse me?” She cocks her blonde head, wiggling her neck in my direction.
“Tori isn’t Alicia, Viv. I’ve been in love with her since…” Viv’s eyes narrow, hanging on my every word. “Well, for a long time. Alicia and I went out on like three dates. I felt nothing, so I broke it off.”
“And she still doesn’t talk to me because of it.”
“Vivian.” I mirror my sister, planting my feet solidly on the ground. “Do you think Tori would ever stop talking to you? You two are like sisters.” Vivian lugs her beer, wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, and looks back out onto the river.
“No, I guess not. But I’d die if she wasn’t in my life anymore.”
“Little sister, I feel the exactsame way.” Viv’s eyes glaze over, and she twists her lips the same way she has since we were little. “And I promise you—”
“Pssht, promises—”
“That if it came down to it, Tori would choose you over me any day of the week.” This realization hits me like a slug to the chest. I love Tori that much, that I’d let her go to save their relationship. “But hopefully, it will never come to that.”
“Wait… youloveTori?” Viv’s jaw unhinges. “Are you being serious?”
“I’ve never been more serious about anything. But if this is going to work, we will need your blessing.” Viv’s silence frightens me. After what feels like an eternity, she throws her hand out in my direction.
“You’ve got my blessing.” I can’t hide my smile as I reach for her hand, but she pulls it away last minute, leaving me gripping the air. “If you promise to be good to her, and if things don’t work out, you let her down easy.”
“Vivian, I can’t imagine things not working out.”
“Oh my God, you’re going to marry my best friend?” Vivian scrunches up her face, and it strikes me so funny that I burst out laughing.
“One step at a time.” I set my beer down and stand, calculating where to go from here. One step at a time.
9
Tori
I’ve never felt lonelier in my whole life. I shove another handful of dark chocolate chips, straight from the package, into my mouth. My roommates are all gone, my job’s probably in jeopardy now, and my best friend hates my guts. Things can’t get much worse, and the biggest problem is that I could’ve prevented this by going to Viv the second I started developing feelings for Zaid. The episode I’m watching on Netflix ends, and I immediately click, “play next,” on my laptop. The only thing keeping me sane right now is hanging out with Friends atCentral Perk.
My phone rests on my belly, rising and falling as I lounge on my bed. Is it so bad to want it all? A good job, a hot boyfriend, and a best friend who understands? I guess for me; it is. I reach for my glass of Pinot Grigio stationed on my nightstand only to find that it’s empty. “And I’m out of wine,” I moan and crawl out of bed.
With no one home, and my air conditioner—an ancient model left by the former tenant—in less than stable condition, I figure it’s safe to wear a big t-shirt and panties. Still, I peer my head out from my room and look both ways, just in case. When I know the coast is clear, I head for the fridge. The cool air from the open door feels so good, I rest my forehead on my arm, perched against the freezer door.
All of this will blow over. I will apologize to Viv until she can’t stand it anymore and has to forgive me. Then, I’ll find a job somewhere else and forget all about Zaid. In a city of nearly nine million people, the chances of me running into him on a whim are slim to none. The white wine glugs in my glass. I fill it a wee bit too much, minimizing the time needed for another refill. I shove the cork back in, close the fridge and proceed through the living room but I’m stopped by the sound of my buzzer.
“Who the hell?” I immediately feel more naked than I actuallyam. I set my glass down on the makeshift entry way table and press down the talk button on the buzzer. “Hello?” No one responds. Instead, I’m meet with the unmistakable buzzing of the door being unlocked.
It must’ve been a mistake. They hit the wrong buzzer; It happens all the time. I take a step back from the door and grab my glass. I don’t make it two steps before there’s a knock on my front door. I slap my hand against my mouth to suppress a gasp. Holding my body perfectly still, I pray that if I don’t move, they’ll just go away.
Knock, knock, knock!
Shit.
I take a cautious step toward the door, my bare feet tiptoeing against the hardwood. My palm rests on the door, and I press my mouth against the space between the door and the frame. “Who is it?”
“Tori, open up.” At first I’m taken aback atsomeone knowing my name. Until I realize who that voice belongs to.