“We both know it has no future, and the more time we spend together, the weirder that is to contemplate.” She twisted her hands together in front of her stomach. “It has to stop. Now.”
“Why now?”
Her heart convulsed painfully. How could she answer that without revealing how much she’d come to care for him? How much she wanted him in her life, not just for now, not for a month, but forever and ever? She couldn’t pinpoint the moment she’d started to feel this way, but she knew she did. She wanted everything she’d promised herself she’d avoid, with a man who’d never offer her more than this. Who couldn’t, because of his country’s expectations, even if he wanted to.
“When did you think we’d end it?” She asked after a beat. “When would be the right time?”
“At some point,” he agreed swiftly, removing any hope that his wishes had shifted too. “But not now. Not when we can’t go even five nights without seeing each other.”
That only hardened her resolve. She didn’t want to be so addicted to him, nor for him to be so addicted to her. “It’s better to end it on our terms.”
“Your terms?”
She tilted her chin. “Isn’t that what you promised me?”
His eyes flashed to hers. “Yes, but that was a long time ago. Things have changed since then.”
“Your promise is no longer valid?”
“If you want to end things, then they’ll end,” he said flatly. “I cannot force you to continue sleeping with me,azeezi.” She flinched at the careless way in which he’d exposed how he viewed their relationship.
She concealed her hurt like the pro she was. “Okay then.”
“No, not ‘okay then’.”
“You just said—,”
“We’ll end things, if that’s what you want. But what Iwant,” he enunciated each word clearly. “Is to understand why. Why now?”
“Does it matter?”
“Yes. To me, that matters very much.”
“This has run its course. We’ve had a good time—a great time—but there’s no point continuing with what we’re doing.”
He crossed his arms over his chest. “The point is that we enjoy it.”
“The point is that it has to end. We both knew that coming into it. We agreed.”
“I just cannot understand. You are upset. Something’s happened…”
“No.” She frowned, searching for words and cursing him inwardly for being able to see beneath her act to how devastated she was. “I’m just being practical.” And then, because she couldn’t admit that she was terrified of how much she was starting to feel for him, she plucked for an excuse. “I’m going to LA next week, to see my godmother. I’ll be there a while. This is just…a good time to wrap things up.”
His eyes bore into hers; she suspected he didn’t believe her. Irritation curdled in her blood. Why was he making this so hard?
“So it’s convenient for you to end it,” he guessed, and she shook her head.
“It’s not that.”
“This makes absolutely no sense. LA or Athens, it doesn’t matter where you are.”
“You told me I was in charge,” she reminded him. “It’s the only reason I agreed to this.”
“I can fly to LA, you know.”
Her heart almost stopped beating. “Why would you do that?”
“To see you. Because I like seeing you.”