He refilled his wineglass and Isa lifted her own and took a long drink. Eyes on hers over the candlelight, his smile was at once nervous and sure. Her heart slammed relentlessly against her ribs. She was unable to keep hope from blooming in her chest and spreading down both arms.
“Corporal Benjamin Hough, Junior,” he said.
Well, that threw her off. Totally not what she’d expected him to say.
“Known as Benji to me and to his wife, Michelle.” Eli’s smile faded. “He was the one who shoved me when Christopher dove on the grenade. He shouldn’t have died from the blast, but a piece of metal shot out like a dart.” Eli pointed at his temple. “Hit him here.”
She winced, her skin zapping her like she’d been pricked with a thousand needles. That strong stomach of hers did a somersault.
“If that stray piece hadn’t found his head, he would have been lying on the ground next to me missing a leg. Maybe two since he was closer.” Eli spun the stem of his glass. “We probably could have bitched our way through rehab together.”
His smile didn’t last.
“I went to see his wife and met her baby—one she and Benji had planned on adopting.”
“You did? That’s amazing.”
“It was. And it started me thinking about what I was doing with my life, whether I was living it to the fullest. I thought long and hard about what Benji would want. About what I would want for him if I was hoeing a row in heaven instead of down here on the pavement.”
Eli met her gaze and Isa realized she hadn’t taken a full breath in a while. His speech seemed to be leading to something big.
“I don’t want to have any regrets,” he said, his voice quiet. “I have been holed up alone since I returned. I’ve challenged everyone I’ve come in contact with. With the exception of my family, you were the only one who challenged me back. The only one who stayed.”
Her breath left between her pursed lips as she mentally talked her blood pressure down to a reasonable level. This was it. He’d had a life epiphany and she was part of it. This was huge.
Massive.
Everything was about to change.
Reaching across the table, he took her hand in his. “Isabella Sawyer. You asked me once if I believed I caused people pain. The answer was yes. But you let me off the hook. You said you were fine with me retreating, but you aren’t, are you? You want me to live up to the promises I make. You push me to be a better man.”
Oh God, here it comes.
She couldn’t speak or keep the tears away. She blinked rapidly, hoping the dim light hid her reaction.
Eli squeezed her hand.
Isa gave him a watery smile.
“I’m stepping in as COO at Crane Hotels,” he said. “The official announcement is happening at the Royale London event.”
With bated breath, she waited for more but he released her hand and sat back, raising his wineglass.
“Good thing you already RSVPd yes for me, right?” he asked with a casual smile.
That was…it? No I love you, Isa, and can’t live without you? She tried to keep the disappointment at bay, but it crashed into her at warp speed.
“You were right to push me toward Crane Hotels,” Eli continued, unaware she was completely devastated. “You were right to encourage me to get involved. I’m working hard to learn to go all in, and this gets me another step closer.”
Going all in? Another step closer to what?
The rug had been pulled out from under her—no, not pulled. It was like the rug had zoomed hundreds of feet over the city with her on it.
“To you, Isa.” He raised his glass in a toast. “Thank you for helping me find where I belong. I couldn’t have done it without you.”
She didn’t raise her glass, too stunned to move. That was the big announcement? He didn’t notice her shock. He tapped his glass against hers and drank.
“Isa? Are you all right?”