Chapter 5
Tasha
God, I loved Taylor Swift. I loved her music and the rhythm of it, and the fact that it was really easy to dance around to in a pair of boxers and a T-shirt with the speakers cranked all the way up.
The novelty of having a home to myself had not worn off. Even in my dorm, I had a roommate.
Still in celebration mode a few days later, I was content to bop in the kitchen while tossing a pizza in the oven. Not the frozen grocery-store kind. This was one you take and bake from the local pizzeria. The kind of homemade dough that bakes up crisp on the edges and chewy in the middle.
Oh, sweet carbs, take me home.
I had just uncorked a bottle of white wine, completing my plans. A delightful evening of kitchen dancing, wine, and way too many calories in the company of myself. That’s right, anything to get me to stop thinking about Cade almost kissing me. Only I hadn’t stopped thinking about it, because there wasn’t anywhere to pack that information. And so it floated around untethered in my head.
The way his eyes heated, the way his lips parted, the tickle of his breath over my skin…
I touched my lips now, realizing that the moment taught me a lot more than I expected. I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted it more than I dared to admit aloud.
So I wouldn’t. Not ever. To anyone.
The song ended and my iPod switched to Ed Sheeran. Much as I loved Ed, the last song I needed right now was one dripping with regrets about love lost. No, thanks. I punched a button and skipped it.
Sipping my wine, I stared at my reflection in the glass of the eye-level black oven. School had been extra sucky today. I was pretty sure I’d failed my test in Critical Analysis, and I’d experienced the unpleasantness of seeing Tony with his new girlfriend.
My ex-boyfriend was bad enough on his own and became infinitely worse when he was with his petite, perfect new girlfriend with big green anime eyes and a skirt so short I could see tan lines. I wrinkled my nose and finished my wine in one gulp.
I used to have Tony over to my dad’s house whenever my dad went out of town. We would spend the weekend lounging on the couch, making food, or making love in my bedroom. And if he wasn’t available (although I learned much later he wasn’t available because he was a dirty cheater), I would invite my girlfriends instead. We’d order pizza and watch movies, impromptu dance parties an inevitable eventuality.
Now I lived on my own, had the place to myself each and every day. Having friends over had stopped when I left Tony. Last year I lived on campus, had a roommate, had a boyfriend, had a bunch of friends. Rarely was there a weekend where I didn’t have a party to go to or a friend’s house to hang out in.
Until…
Tony was caught kissing an acquaintance named Jamie. Next I found out that not only was Tony kissing Jamie, he was sleeping with her. To top that off, I found out he had also slept with two of my other friends. While he and I were dating.
When my roommate moved off campus to save money this year, that left me with a bunch of slutty friends who avoided me like the proverbial plague.
So. Here I was.
Alone, because hanging around a bunch of bitches who would just as soon sleep with my boyfriend as look at me was worse.
I refilled my wine. The direction of my thoughts made me consider drinking the entire bottle. Just as I lifted the glass to take a sip, the buzzer rang.
Given my friendless state, and the fact that I’d seen Rena only yesterday, I couldn’t imagine who would be here. I went to the box next to my front door and pressed a button.
“Hello?” I greeted.
No response.
I punched the button again and repeated, “Hellooo?”
Nothing.
I gave up, but as soon as I turned my back the buzzer announced itself again in a succession of three quick zzzts.
“What!” I said into the speaker.
“It’s m-me.”
My face went warm. “Cade? What are you doing here?”