“No, I think you’re right,” I say. “It’s probably better if we find somewhere else to stay.”
“I’d just rather be safe than sorry,” she says. “I’m eighteen, and I’ve saved up some money. I can put down a deposit on a place. It’s just a couple weeks until graduation, and then I can get a full-time job to pay rent every month.”
“We’ll both get jobs,” I say, stroking the back of her ring finger with my thumb.
“Wait, you’re moving out too?”
“Well, yeah,” I say. “I mean, he’s just as dangerous to me as he is to you. Maybe more. And you know I’m a heavy sleeper. I’m not trying to go to sleep one night and be easy prey when he comes home.”
“Oh,” she says faintly. “Are you sure?”
“Sure this is worth it?” I ask, stroking her chestnut hair back and tucking it behind her hear. “Si.I’m more than sure. I know you are.”
I kiss her until she responds, and I taste her blood, and it’s so sweet I don’t even care that Maddox drew it first. I sit back, and I pick up a glazed doughnut.
“I want to be with you, Rae. Just you and me. No matter what.” Slowly, I push it onto her finger.
She stares down at it for a second, then raises her startled gaze to mine. Her voice comes out a choked whisper. “Lennox… What are you doing?”
“I’m asking you to choose me.”
“What?” she breathes, looking like she might faint.
“I want you to be mine,” I say, stroking back her damp hair and searching her gaze. “I’ve wanted it since the first moment we met, when you told me your name and I said we’d be the North-Wests. I know you had to figure yourself out this past year, figure out what you wanted and learn who my brother really was. But I haven’t changed. You haven’t changed. I still want you despite what you did. I want you just as much today as I did then. Even more. I’ve never met someone like you, Rae.”
“What are you talking about?” she asks. “Someone like what?”
I slide my hand around the back of her head and make her look at me. “Someone who voluntarily chooses to sit with the Slut Club because you like them, and you don’t care what people think. Someone who walked around school alone, when people called you a snitch, and didn’t let a single one of them get to you, but who will completely lose her shit over a bird dying. And the way you makemelose my shit when I touch you… You’re spectacular, Rae. I’ve never felt this way about anyone.”
She swallows and drops her gaze, but I hold her head so she can’t duck away. “How do I know you don’t say that to every girl you want to sleep with?”
“You should know by now this isn’t about sex,” I say. “I’m not going to pressure you into anything. I’m not my brother. Hell, I’ll wait until our wedding night to prove to you that this isn’t about sex. It’s about you, Rae. You and me. My world’s already a better place because you’re in it. Let me make yours better too. Don’t you want to make the world a better place with me?”
She hesitates a long moment, then nods, staring down at her doughnut ring.
“Don’t worry, I’ll get you something better than that,” I say, rubbing the back of her sticky finger. “So what do you say? Will you marry me?”
thirty-one
#1 on the Billboard Chart:
“The Boy is Mine”—Brandy & Monica
Rae West
“You’re not mad?” I ask Valeria, dropping a handful of carrot shavings onto the bed of lettuce in the big serving bowl she handed me.
“Mad? No,” she says, setting aside the plate of arepas. “Sad, yes. I knew this day was coming, seeing my sons move out. I just didn’t think it would come so soon.”
“He’s going to college in the fall,” I point out, reaching over to flip the chicken in the pan so it doesn’t burn. “It’ll be good to have a place right by campus. And we’ll be right across town…”
“I know,” she says, shooing me away from the chicken. “I know. I just thought they’d live at home through college at least, but more likely until they got married.”
I laugh nervously and sprinkle cheese over the salad. I just broke the news that we found an apartment, only a month after graduation. Lennox will have to share the other announcement. Since the day Lennox proposed, when I finally broke down and told him about Maddox’s threats in the parking lot, he’s insisted I stay with Lexi. So this visit serves a few purposes. I’m here to gather the last of my meager stash of clothes and other belongings, thank Valeria for her generosity, and to break the news.
“When did you get married?” I ask, hoping to ease us into the conversation.
“Too young,” she says. “I met their father at my first job when I moved here. We both worked in the kitchen at El Chico. And here this handsome American wanted to sweep me off my feet. I was flattered at first, but I kept telling him no. But he kept asking, and finally I went out with him. Then I fell in love and lost my head.”