The whole ride, Cara just sits there, staring at the floor of the car. Unsure what to do, I let my arm fall around her shoulders, drawing her closer. She’d cried on the way to my brother’s, but I guess the tears have dried up by now. Her eyes are rimmed with red, her cheeks flushed. Her hair falls in tangles down her shoulders. I don’t know what exactly happened between her and the men who tried to grab her, but I know she’ll tell me when she’s ready.
Somewhere between Dante’s house and my own apartment, she falls asleep. I let her head rest against my shoulder, barely daring to breathe in case I wake her up. Her body still doesn’t relax, even when she’s completely out of it. I brush the hair from her face gently, my chest constricting at the sight of her. I’d already checked her for injuries back at the house and found none physically. But I’m sure there are mental bruises I’ve yet to see.
When Niccolo parks in the garage, I gently ease her out, taking her in my arms. She still doesn’t wake. Her head rests in the crook of my shoulder. I’m trying to be careful with her as we make our way to the elevator, trying not to wake her. Her fingers gently fist my shirt in her sleep, her body still tense.
She could have been taken tonight or killed in the crossfire, and it would have been all my fault. I hadn’t protected her as I should have. I don’t know how she got that gun, but I suspected she’d been trying to tell me she managed to get it off her attackers…and used it. If only I’d been there. I could have gotten us out earlier. She wouldn’t have had to fend for herself. She wouldn’t have had to fire that gun.
I’d checked the blanks on the way over to Dante’s. Two bullets were missing. Which means there were at least two men she’d had to fight off all on her own. I’m both impressed, and a bit horrified that I hadn’t been able to stop that from happening. She’d needed me…and I’d let her go in alone.
My hands tighten around her body, pinning her closer. Even now, she looks too innocent in sleep. Too perfect even after the ordeal she’d just gone through. But I know something’s been broken. And it wasn’t by me as I’d promised.
No, someone else had done the breaking; that alone is enough to make me see red.
I fight back the fury as we take the elevator to the lobby first. Anger would do her no good now. Dante and Sienna were right. My first priority was making sure she was alright. As we step out, I find a few of Owen’s men waiting for us. They’d heard what had happened. A few might even blame me just as much as I do from the looks on their faces.
Ignoring them, I immediately start to head up. Niccolo motions for three of our men from the lobby to follow us, along with the Irish, and we squeeze into the elevator. I’m careful not to let her head hit the wall, curling her into my chest even more. One of Callahan’s soldiers tries to take her from me, but I force him back with one look.
They set up various positions around and outside my apartment as I take her to my bedroom. Her room was still destroyed from her little fit the other day, and I won’t have her sleeping on a broken bed like this. Not while under my roof. Niccolo helps pull back the duvet as I gently set her down, brushing the hair back from her head before slipping off her shoes.
“I’ll go get a glass of water for her,” Niccolo mutters. He shuts the door quietly behind him as I take a seat at the edge of the mattress.
Cara stirs but doesn’t wake. Her soft lips part slightly, head turning towards me. My heart lodges in my throat at the sight of her. Dark, raven hair splayed out against my black covers, pale skin nearly glowing in the city lights from the windows.
She needs rest for now. And here I am staring at her like a creepy idiot, just watching. I move to get up when soft fingers wrap around my wrist. Startled, I hesitate, glancing back. Cara’s eyes are open now, watching me. There’s a slight crease between her brows, her teeth biting her lower lip.
“Can you stay?”
“You need rest,tesorina.” I gently start to pry her fingers from my arm.
She only tightens her grip. “Killian…please.”
My eyes flick between her and the door before I make a split decision. Sighing, I turn back, motioning for her to move over. She inches away, leaving me just enough room to stretch out beside her. Her head rests perfectly in the crook of my arm, her fingers splayed against my chest. I know she can hear my heart beating, feel it against her fingers.
“Thank you.” Her voice is so soft. So small. Those two words nearly rip me apart.
“For what?”
“For saving me today.”
The Cara I knew would never have said that so easily. Or sound so shaken. A flash of anger burns through me—some at her. But mostly at me. Because I’d failed. Because I hadn’t been capable enough of saving her. I didn’t want her to be weak like this. I didn’t want her to bebroken. I know she’s stronger than this. She has to be. Because if this was enough to break her…then she would never make it when shit hit the fan. And I need her to survive.
Rolling on top of her, I pin her arms above her head. Cara’s eyes go wide, lips parting in surprise, but I don’t move. I don’t let her go.
“Killian…what thehellare you doing?” There it is. That spark.
“What did they do to you?” I ask quietly, bending closer until our lips barely brushing. Her breath hitches in her throat, panic rising in her eyes. “Did they hold you down? Or maybe…” one hand leaves her wrists, fingers tangling in her hair, “they grabbed you like this?” My body presses against hers, the heat of her already making me hard.
“What are you doing?” she asks again, breathless. Her body shifts under mine, and I can feel her heart hammering against her chest.
“I want to know what they did to break you so easily.” I sneer, tightening my grip on her hair. I give her head a small yank, and she winces in pain, biting back a soft cry. I almost want to stop. But Dante had never gone easy on me. And I can’t go easy on her.
“Stop it,” she whispers. Her eyes squeeze shut, trying to block out the memories.
I kiss her savagely. There’s nothing gentle in my touch now. No kindness. No understanding. Just pure anger. Her hips buck, trying to throw me off as she twists beneath my hands. I press my weight down, pinning her. We both gasp as I break the kiss, her chest heaving. Red tinges her cheeks now, and…finally, there’s that spark in her eye.
“Did they do anything else to you?” I ask coldly. “Touch you?” My eyes rove down her body as if she were mine for the taking. As if I owned her. Cara snarls, trying to free her hands. “Did you like it?”
“Fuck you,” she spits, and I kiss her again.