OCTAVIA
Iwake up in a thunderstorm of a mood. I’ve been so excited about everyone being here, that it was easy to push away the fact that this will be my first Thanksgiving without my dad. But now that it’s here, I wish I hadn’t arranged anything. Even with learning more of the truth of who he was and what he was mixed up in, none of that takes away from the fact that he was a fucking awesome dad, and that I miss him.
You don’t have to be a great person to be a great dad. Though I find it almost impossible to merge the version of him that the guys have with the man I knew.
All I want to do is sit in the bottom of the shower, cry, and eat ice cream until my chest doesn’t hurt anymore, but I promised myself that I wouldn’t bury my head in the sand anymore. I’ve done enough of that. While I don’t want to see anyone, especially those people who are going to remind me of my dad—it’s going to be so much more obvious that he isn’t here with them all around—I know that seeing them is exactly what I need to heal.
I’ve been tossing and turning since the ass crack of dawn, toying with the idea of pretending to be sick, but the thought of letting everyone down when they’ve come all this way to spend the day here makes me feel even worse.
It’s going to be one of those “Suck it up, buttercup” kind of days.
My phone pings on the nightstand for the eleven millionth time so I roll over and pick it up.
Indi:
I’ll be over soon, do you need me to bring anything?
Indi:
V?
Indi:
Hellllooooooo
Indi:
Did you die? I swear TG if you died and you don’t haunt me, imma be pissed.
Indi:
Worrying just a little. Are you okay?
The corners of my mouth tug up. Thank God for my little ball of joy.
Me:
I’m here, sorry, slept in. We don’t need you to bring anything but you. Just jumping in the shower now.
Smiling at just how lucky I am to have her in my life, I send her another message with the code for the gate so she can get in if I’m in the shower or Smithy is busy then climb out of bed. I glance over at the Saints’ house through the glass doors in my room, wondering what today will bring. I know Smithy said they were both coming, but where two of those boys are, the others will surely be.
They’re like a pack of wolves in that they rarely travel alone.
Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and head into the bathroom, trying to psych myself up for this day. I don’t want to be the storm cloud that rains on everyone's parade.
Turning on the shower, I step under the hot spray and try to wash off the funk that I woke up in.
I hurry through my usual routine, knowing that Indi will be here soon, and quickly sort my hair and dress once I’m done.
Smithy already has the house in full freaking swing by the time I make it downstairs. There are decorations everywhere and my mood lifts a little. This season is my favorite, and he has not forgotten, apparently.
A smile tugs at my lips as I follow the delightful smells coming from the kitchen and find Smithy working away. “Good morning, Miss Octavia! Happy Thanksgiving!”
“Happy Thanksgiving! This all smells amazing already. What can I do to help?”
He looks at me in horror. “Oh no you don’t. You don’t need to do anything at all. I already told you about this poor kitchen.”
I laugh at him because I can tell he’s deadly serious. “Okay, if you’re sure. What’s the plan for the day?”