Chapter Four
Shelby
Of course you're not good enough, you ninny. Haven't you listened to a thing I've said? Hmph!
I completely ignored the oh so unhelpful criticism my mind conjured and crossed my legs, making the short skirt ride up almost indecently on my thigh. Glaring at my new fiancé, pissed that he obviously had an agenda that he hadn't bothered to clue me in on, I waited for whatever excuse he'd have. A perfectly reasonable one, I’m sure, I thought scathingly.
Dirk's own temper flared, eyes going hard and flat with his lip curled in disapproval until he visibly relaxed and banked his anger. "Language, Shelby! I love you as you are, but certain things are expected for—"
"You love me?" My body nearly lurched toward him with my demand. I had to consciously sit back and exert some control before I did something stupid—like jumping him and saying fuck the rest of the conversation.
I had to soothe my battered emotions; they were getting jerked left, right, and upside down. Of course, that's what I wanted to hear, so I latched onto it. Neither of us had said so yet, and I'd been afraid he would laugh at me or drop me like a stage-five clinger. I was mad, but hell, I'd waited what seemed forever to hear it, and now we were arguing!
Tipping his head down, Dirk pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why exactly did you accept my proposal, Shelby? You say you don't care about my money, and you thought there was a decent chance that Cindy Jenkins was my girlfriend, yet you said yes without knowing my feelings?" The frustration cleared as his brows rose. "Is it your home situation? You don't have to marry me for me to help you get away from there."
Instant mortification set in. One, that he even thought I'd use him like that, and two, that I'd need to escape. Which was sort of the case, but not one I wanted to examine. Did he just dump you?
Oh crap, I hoped not. I hurried to fix the confusion before I had to call Guinness for the shortest engagement in history.
Hello, stupid, why are you having to make things right?
Jesus, you're a pain in my ass.
"Well, I hoped you did, but I know I'm not your usual type, and... shit, I don't know, Dirk. I felt like I'd die if I said no." I winced a bit at his nonplussed look when I cussed. "I want a life with you, but I'm always insecure when it comes to what I think your expectations are, and then those women in the restroom, ugh... It was just a lot, and I didn't want to ruin everything when you offered exactly what I wanted. Still want," I corrected at his raised brows. "But that doesn't get you off the hook for who this Nina is,” I finished firmly with an imaginary pat on my back and a muzzle on crazy town.
I had a hard enough time telling anyone 'no,' especially Mama, but I didn't want that for my relationship with Dirk. For this to work, I needed it to be on an even keel and for me to be just as important as my significant other.
"Very well, Shelby, I suppose this isn't quite how I envisioned our evening going either," he answered with more than a hint of self-deprecation. "Nina was Rafe's nanny, and I've retained her services for you." At my clueless shrug and scrunched features, Dirk added, "My younger brother? I'm sure I've mentioned him. He's close to your age, only turned twenty-one a few weeks ago."
I remembered a brother; I'd just never known his name as far as I could recall, and said as much.
"We aren't the closest of siblings. He's somewhat of a black sheep, so I may not have referred to him by name. Anyhow, Nina agreed, if you accepted my proposal, to teach you everything you need to know. And since I very much doubt that your mother will be thrilled with events, Nina can double as a chaperone until we're married."
For a moment, all I could do was blink. A chaperone? In this era?Cackling I would swear was loud enough to echo from my ears accompanied my annoyance, and I full-on agreed with that assessment. But could I argue against it? I mean, I knew I could, but was it worth it? For all I knew, it was a deal breaker if I refused to accept the woman's tutelage, and likely a much worse faux pas than asking the uppity bartender for water. I sighed and nodded, letting that encompass the whole of my feelings, before I slumped into Dirk's side like a marionette with its strings cut. His arm was stretched out across the back of the davenport, and the space it created had called my name.
"I take it that means you're okay with everything and that the engagement is still on?'' he asked, his voice laced with wary amusement.
"Mm-hmm, mine now," I mumbled, patting his chest with the mostly limp hand resting on it. My other arm was awkwardly trapped, and I was sure I'd regret it later when it was asleep, but the day's events had caught up with me in a rush. Plus, the wine, paired with the contented relief, did me in. I must have been asleep before he answered because I had no idea what happened after that.
* * *
Iwasn’t sure how long I slept there, but the motion of being carried roused me from my slumber. It was an unfamiliar sensation, that of being securely swept up in strong arms, the small hairs on them tickling the backs of my legs, but I quite liked it. Dirk settled me onto my shoeless feet in front of the bathroom vanity. The coolness of the floor was somewhat unwelcome, but the sight of a toothbrush and paste in the muted light was definitely welcome. My mouth was dry and stale after the nap and residue from the wine.
"I'll be right back, darling. Would you like something to sleep in?" The question was commonplace enough, but the implication it heralded had my libido perking up. I suspected that whichever way I answered would determine how the rest of the night proceeded.
"No, I'm fine, thank you." I smiled sleepily at my fiancé while he backed out of the bathroom. As soon as he was gone, I hurried through freshening up, using the high-end products provided by the hotel to wash my face, moisturize, and of course to wash under my arms and lady bits before slapping the delicate floral-scented deodorant on.
Naked, I slid in between the turned down sheets, all but rubbing on the luxurious fabric like a cat, a scant minute before Dirk reappeared in dark, form-fitting boxer-briefs. The lighting filtering in from the bathroom wasn't the best, as it was already barely more than a nightlight's worth, but what I could make out as he walked toward me had me antsy to explore.
As he reached the opposite side from where I reclined against a mound of pillows, the sheet pulled up modestly over my chest, Dirk paused with his thumbs hooked into his underwear. "Are you sure, darling? We can just sleep if you'd prefer." My answer was to sit up farther...and drop the sheet, letting it pool around my waist to expose my high breasts, their rosy tips standing at attention. A deep, masculine chuckle rumbled from his chest as he shucked his underwear off in a single motion.
He straightened, letting me take in his pale flesh, tight and toned with a hint of a tan and a smattering of chest hair that turned into a thin line, leading down to a semi-erect cock. It was the first time I'd seen any part of him unclothed and only the second time for men in general, unless you counted the boys at school streaking on a dare. This was much different, and I wished the lighting were better and that he'd tarried just a bit more before joining me between the sheets. It was okay though; I'd have plenty of time in the future to explore him to my heart's content.
Admittedly, I'd expected more passion than I got, but Dirk's approach was much more controlled than any of our heavy petting sessions had been. He kissed me firmly, but even when it turned to open-mouthed caresses of his lips on mine, his tongue never tried to enter, and I felt too awkward to initiate it. When he trailed his attention down my jaw and neck to settle on my clavicle, the tip of his tongue finally came out to trace the still-sensitive marks where he'd bitten me.
"I apologize for being so rough earlier. I shouldn't have treated you like that."
"It's fine," I assured him, a shiver running through me at the memory. "I kinda liked it."