Ivan wasn’t around which meant he was on some mystery trip around town doing something he’d never tell us about. I couldn’t figure out if he was the good guy in all this, and I didn’t know if I’d ever know. I supposed that had more to do with my general distrust of people, and my extreme prejudice towards men after everything that had happened to me.
He wasn’t the type to be trafficking human beings on the side, though. He didn’t give off that vibe, which meant I was on his side, no matter what it was he did on these days away from us.
We sat in the hot steam and let the physical pains leach from our bodies. It was mostly silent and I thought I heard one of them gently snoring as he drifted into sleep. I smiled at it, being around them like this was perfection but I wasn’t putting them on a pedestal just yet. I knew they were perfectly human and had their flaws.
Everybody had their flaws. Even me, like my major flaw that I thought I kept hidden pretty well. The fact that killing Thackeray had felt so good. It was all I thought about in moments like this, the way the blade had sliced through his neck with little resistance. The sound he’d made and the terror in his eyes as he lost his life at my hands.
It had been one of the biggest thrills of my life and I worried that meant I was a sociopath. I wondered if there was such a thing as somebody who got off on killing, and what that said about my personality.
“What are you thinking about?” Ryker asked without looking at me. He had his head leaning on the wall behind him and his eyes were closed.
“Just murder thoughts,” I replied with complete honesty.
“I suspected as much,” he replied. “I’ve seen that look on you before.”
“I can’t help it,” I said and smiled at him. “How did you know, though? Your head’s leaning back.”
“I can always sense what you’re thinking, princess,” I replied with a cocky grin and a wink. Then he reached over and slid his hand down my back, cupped my ass in his hand and gave it a squeeze. “I’ll bet you know what I’m thinking right now.”
“That’s not really magic or anything,” I giggled. “You’re thinking about that all the time.”
“If you weren’t so fucking hot, I might be able to give my brain a rest,” he said and put his hand on the small of my back. “That’s not gonna happen, though, so I’m not gonna stop thinking about fucking that sweet little pussy of yours any time soon.”
“I wouldn’t expect you to,” I replied, my core melting immediately at his words and I had a flash of him pounding me hard from above, his face in ecstasy, his muscled body glistening from the sweat of our sex, a frozen snapshot in time.
God, it was hot. I guess there was something I liked thinking about more than murder. Sex was infinitely more pleasurable and time consuming for my head. I’d rather give into flights of fantasies with my guys than remember Thackeray at all.
Then again, the spewing thick red blood pouring from his neck would make a beautiful picture in my head the next time I came. I might dabble in it, dip my toes in the water so to speak, and see if I could double up on what thrilled me by thinking my murder thoughts while I was in the throes of passion.
After a while, it got too hot for real and we headed towards the master bedroom to cool off and change our clothes.
“You have such a relaxed look on your face,” Valen said as he walked by my side. “Like you’d love to be fucked good and hard tonight to welcome the new year.”
“That’s the only way I want to celebrate,” I said. “The absolute only way.”
“Are you ready for your driving test?” Amara called up from downstairs. She knew how to stand under the dome of the grand entrance and have her voice echo through the mansion.
She was waiting for me when I got downstairs and said, “You should get out there and hit the roads. Take the Mercedes G Wagon, it’s not customized but it drives like a tank. It will be safe.”
“What about a Range Rover?” I asked. “I like the way they look and they seem to have a lot of speed.”
“That’s exactly why you’re not taking one,” she said, her eyes closing slyly. “I don’t want you to be fast, I want you to be safe.”
“I could be both,” I said.
“Eventually, maybe. But not now, not tonight.”
“Who’s giving me my lesson today?”
“Whoever you want,” Amara replied. “But remember, Ivan isn’t here until dinner. You can choose from one of your boyfriends, or take them all.”
“I just might,” I said, and thanked her. She nodded and left us then, and I decided to have them all give me my lesson for the day, taking turns.
“When is everyone coming over?” Archer asked as we walked to the garage at the side of the house.
“Mom and Nat will probably come over for a late dinner. Penny and Mark will come after that, maybe nine or ten. They have to go to Mark’s house to see his family for a short time first.”
“Then we have lots of time to explore the town with you at the wheel, princess,” Ryker said. “This should be fun.”