“I can’t do it,” I hissed and the anger I felt in my chest was impossible to ignore. It clenched my heart in a vice and kept my breath in my throat. “I can’t forgive you, mom, so stop asking me. I think you should leave before I fucking tell you exactly how I feel.”
Her lower lip quivered, and she stood up in silence and left the room.
My head was reeling, and I hated that she’d lied to me all these years. She’d stolen money from my dad and fought with him, so no wonder he left and never came back. She’d given the money to her family, proving herself to be absolute trash over and over again. I still couldn’t tell if she’d known about Reg, I didn’t know how much I could trust her.
But it made me yearn to talk to my father even more.
I had to know his side of everything. I had to know if he’d missed me over the years.
And I had to know how much of him I had in my DNA.
CHAPTER18
Friday wasthe last day of classes before Christmas break. I had gone through the school week without any more problems and had even managed to sneak away with the Kings and Ryker for some quick fun over lunch break a couple times.
My grades needed work, I was floundering in a couple classes and needed to catch up. It should be easy enough for me, once I had time to work on it. Besides, I wasn’t so much worried about earning a scholarship anymore at least, I would have money from any number of sources to provide for my college tuition when I decided to go.
Now it was more of a matter of getting into a place that I wanted to attend. But with the way my life was going, even that was falling lower and lower on my list of priorities.
On Friday afternoon I met with Penny and Mark and we went on a quick hike up one of the nearby mountains just to get out into nature. Mark being there meant I couldn’t catch her up on everything, but I’d given her the basics on my mother’s story over the phone that night. Still, I wanted to talk to her about it.
Nature was always good for the soul, though, and by the time we got back to the car, I had figured out what I wanted to do. Penny and Mark’s upbeat chatter had given me time to ruminate on it all in my head, coming to a conclusion on my own.
I decided I wanted to talk to my dad. I wanted Ivan Popov to get his ass back to Oakville so we could figure out our relationship and how we were going to fit into each other’s lives.
Amara wasn’t too keen on the idea when I broached it at Friday’s training session.
I was two weeks into my intense training and was catching on faster than any of us had imagined. We were just about to start sparring when I told her of my need to have Ivan come to see me.
“You don’t just summon Ivan,” she responded with a smile. “He’s not a demon or one of your subjects. Summon your boys if you want, but your father will show up on his own time.”
“I just want to talk to him, I’m not demanding anything from him other than a relationship. I think I’m owed at least that after everything I’ve been through.”
“You think you’re the only one who has been through shit, little girl?” Amara asked. She had a small smile on her face but her eyes were dead flat and hard. She wasn’t happy with my wishes, but she didn’t have the authority to completely keep me away from my father.
“Of course I’m not,” I said. “I’m not even close to being the only one, which is why I want to talk to him. There are many others like me out there and I saw them at the prison. Young people who were trapped and forced to fight and fuck for old men’s pleasure. I want to end all that, I want to set them free.”
Amara scoffed and said, “That’s a noble thought, but do you think your father hasn’t come up with the same idea? Do you think it’s just that easy to tear down something the Organization has spent years building up?”
“Then where do we start?” I demanded with frustration. “How do we start going after them? I’m ready to attack, I just need a fucking target. But I want him to tell me which way to go, I want to hear it from him.”
“He doesn’t owe you that,” she said and then she sighed. “But okay, I’ll approach him with the idea. If he’s not too far under cover, we might be able to bring him here for a visit.”
“That’s all I’m asking for,” I said and drew my fists up to strike her. “But first, let’s kick each other’s asses for a while to get that energy out.”
“I’m old, you’re the only one with energy,” she laughed, and then she slammed her fist into my chest out of nowhere. Amara might have some years on me, but old she was not. She in her prime, fit and ready to throw hands at a moment’s notice.
She was everything I was aspiring to be now that I knew her.
We worked for a while, and when we were done, I found the guys on the lawn again. The evening air was chilly and even they were visibly affected when they weren’t moving.
I wanted to get into a shower and warm up with them, but I’d promised Nat that I would go to her Christmas dance performance.
It was a little annoying, I’d much rather stick around with the Kings and Ryker, but I wanted to see Nat’s face light up when she spotted me in the audience so I went.
One of my father’s people drove me to the school in a sleek black SUV and waited for me while we were inside.
I found a seat next to my mother, and she immediately stiffened up when I took my place.