“How do you know?” she asked.
“I cannot know for sure, but I can have faith that things are changing, and we must change with them. If we don’t, then what about the next generation? Should my children live their life in constant fear of what might not ever happen? I know I want my children to see the world, be all they want to be, and not be afraid of people from different cultures. Mom, I work for a man from Ireland. He’s a good, kind man. Our own president is marrying him. Others from Tabiq have married men from outside of Tabiq. I’m not saying that all foreigners are good, just like not all Tabiqians are good. But they are not all bad, either. You just need to trust me to know the difference.”
She looked at me steadily, and I thought she was going to start bawling all over again. But instead, she said, “Nothing I say is going to change your mind.”
“Mom, what you said changed a lot, but if anything, it now is even more important that I go.”
“Why?”
I patted her hand and said, “To show other Tabiqian women that we don’t have to live in fear.”
I got up and hugged both my parents for what seemed like an eternity. There was so much more I’d like to know, but my mom had been through enough today. Someday, we’d need to continue this conversation. Someday when our hearts aren’t so raw and so filled with pain.
I went up to my room and turned off my phone. Tonight, I needed to be alone, but I had agreed to have dinner with the president. At least I have a few hours before that was to take place. I needed to find the strength to be fearless, because right now, I was shaking from the inside out.
I’m glad I know, but then again, I’m not glad at all.
The tears came and I knew they weren’t going to stop for a long time.