He pulls his fingers out, and I cry out in pain at the loss, but he instantly replaces his fingers with his cock. Slowly this time, I feel every single inch of him as he slides into the hilt. I bite my tongue to stop the moan that wants to break free. If these walls are anything like my own, they're paper thin and any and every neighbor can hear us on the block.
He grabs ahold of my hair, wrapping it around his hand like a rein as he picks up his pace, slamming into me so hard that I feel him in my lungs. It's like he's angry and trying to fuck the guilt and pain out of himself.
He reaches around, sliding his long, strong fingers in between my slit and instantly finds my clit. My knees buckle, but Jackson releases my hip with his free hand and swings it under my stomach, holding me up as he continues to pummel into me at a brutal pace.
My toes curl as my stomach heats. I'm afraid to let this orgasm take hold. I'm afraid it's going to swallow me up. I'm like a rag doll at this point, loose limbs held up by Jackson's strong ones. All I can do is whimper and let out tiny moans as I'm ravaged and taken to heights I've never been before.
Darkness enters the corners of my sight, and the warm, tingling sensation I'm all too familiar with takes over my body. My body gives out again, and this time, Jackson lets me fall to his bed. Pressing his fists into the comforter on either side of me, he pounds into me only a few more times before letting out a low growl as he finds his own release.
I feel him slide out of me and fall on the bed next to me. I open my eyes, my foggy vision only slightly clearing enough for me to see darkness. His room, filled with dark furniture, decorates his dark walls. His mattress sits in the middle of the room, and directly above it sits a tiny light fixture, not nearly enough strength in it to brighten up this dungeon of a room.
That's it.
No decorations, no color, no light. It's like a jail cell in here. It's depressing.
My eyes fill with tears as I think of Jackson laying here each night in the dark, empty room filled with no personal memorabilia, no tv, not even a fucking clock. Bed, dresser, nightstand. Black, black, black. This room is a black hole of depression. I cry silently into the pillow as Jackson's breath evens out next to me. I know I'm not only crying for Jackson. I'm crying for everything that's happened lately. My emotions are spiraling out of control.
I can't take it anymore.
I close my eyes and try to swallow down my cries, but my eyes keep flowing tear after never ending tear. The pillow turns soggy, but eventually sleep starts to creep in on me, and I'm grateful when it comes so I don't have to think about my shit of a life for a while.
* * *
I'm jostledawake as the mattress moves, and the body next to me starts grabbing at my body with needy hands. I smile at first, so happy that Logan is with me.
My eyes spring open.
I open my mouth to cry, but nothing comes out besides a painful breath. Jackson lifts me up, tearing off my dress that's been bunched over my waist since the bathroom. I'm deposited on top of his cock, and I slide down, feeling like I need some more liquor to numb the pain. I'm definitely feeling sober now, and it's not a good feeling.
Not good at all.
I move up and down, wanting to fuck the pain out of me like Jackson did earlier. I ride him hard, slamming down each time and letting out a little moan. Jackson lifts up on his elbows, leaning forward and licking my cheeks. It's not until he pulls away that I realize I'm crying.
What… he's licking my tears?
He leans back on his pillow, his brows furrowed as he licks his lips. He places his hands on my waist, letting me take the lead but still keeping some control.
My eyes can't stop crying.
The burning heat ignites a fire between my legs. My chest feels like it's tearing in two. My head feels like it's pounding so hard, I'm going to crack open. My eyes stay focused on Jackson, and as I cry, and cry, and cry, Jackson stares deeper and deeper into me. Soon enough, we both tumble off the edge, together this time, and I weep, falling on top of Jackson and curling into his chest. I burrow my face underneath his arm and seek any kind of comfort and safety I can get.
Hesitantly, Jackson curls his arms around my body, caging me in and settling into a comfortable position. I stay there, curled into the nook of Jackson's arm as sleep takes me a second time.
* * *
When I wake a second time,it's to an empty bed and cool sheets. At least I know where I am this time. My body feels sore, well used. I stretch and if it weren't for the peek of light coming from underneath the darkened curtains, I would think it's still the middle of the night.
Jackson stands near those curtains, looking down at his phone with not a care in the world. When he notices movement on the bed, he glances up at me.
No furrowed brow from last night. What I thought was an inkling of emotion has been wiped from his face and in its place is his usual blank stare.
"Hi." I whisper. What now?
He bends down, and when he stands back up, my dress is in his hands as he tries to hand it to me.
I take it with a frown, looking at it, to him, and back to my dress. "Okay…" I sit up, pulling the comforter over my chest to cover myself. I suddenly feel very, very unwelcome.
He fuckingstartedit.