4
Jessa
I openmy eyes and yet again, find myself in a room I haven’t woken up in before. Declan’s room is very much him. His sheets are black, the walls are painted a stormy sky grey, and the bed and dresser are made of wrought iron.
The mattress is soft beneath my body, almost like a pillow, and the blanket thrown across me feels as if it’s full of down feathers. Yawning, I sit up and look around the room. I’m alone.
Where did he go?
He was here when I fell asleep. I felt his body pressing up against mine, his warmth seeping into my bones. My heart beats faster just thinking about it. I’ve never felt so content, so wanted, so cherished, as I did when Declan held me in his arms last night. It was a big step for him and something he didn’t have to do, but chose to.
Sitting up, I reflect on everything that happened last night. The knife, the blood. The way he owned my body, my soul. I think about what it meant. I already know what it meant for me. My feelings haven’t changed. After last night, they’ve only solidified.
I was already prepared to stay with them. I wanted nothing more than to be theirs in every way. The question now is, how does Declan feel about this? Has he finally agreed with his brothers, or was last night a one-time thing? The thought of losing them, it hurts, like a branding iron pressing against my heart. If Declan rejects me after what we shared… I don’t know if I’ll come back from that.
A memory from last night tugs at me. I was nearly asleep when he said the words, but I’m positive he meant them. “As it turns out, I think I want to keep you around after all.” I smile to myself as I crawl out of bed. It’s unlike the brothers to give me free rein as they’re doing right now. I haven’t so much as done one thing by myself on this level. So their trust in me must be significant, which is surprising after my actions yesterday. Though I suppose saving Declan’s life saved my ass.
Padding into the bathroom I turn the light on. My bladder is currently screaming at me. My eyes catch on my reflection in the mirror. The small red gash on my stomach sticks out like a sore thumb against my ivory skin. I almost wish it was a permanent gash, something I could look at often to remind me that all of this is real, that Declan doesn’t want to kill me anymore.
When I’m done in the bathroom, I start to move around the bedroom, feeling a little lost. The need to go and search for the brothers intensifies with each second I’m left alone. It’s like finally, after all this time of wanting them to leave me alone, I miss them not being right there. In need of clothing, I open the first drawer of Declan’s dresser and luckily find his shirts.
Pulling the over my head, I let the fabric drop down my body. It fits me more like a dress, coming to rest just above my knees. I involuntarily shiver and my nipples harden at the coldness that cascades across my flesh. I walk to the door and reach for the knob, hesitating for a moment.
A sliver of doubt takes root in my gut. Are they going to be okay with me just walking around? Going where I please? Or did Declan want me to stay in bed? Maybe they even locked the door? I shake my head, willing the thoughts away as I twist the knob. The door opens and a small wave of relief washes over me. Clearly, they don’t see me as a captive anymore. As soon as I step into the hallway, my ears perk up.
I hear voices coming from the kitchen and I follow the noise until I’m standing in the entryway of the kitchen. For some unknown reason, I’m nervous. Every interaction we’ve ever had has revolved around sex, and now it seems we’re going to be interacting as, well, almost as couples. I take in the scene before me. Trey is at the stove flipping a pancake, while Wes sits at the kitchen table, fork and knife in hand. Wes notices me first and gives me a wicked grin that has my already out of control hormones on fire.
Trey’s head pops up and turns in my direction almost simultaneously. It’s almost like they can sense my presence or something.
“Hey, sleeping beauty, come sit with me.” Wes waves me over to him, pulling out the chair beside him almost at the same time.
“Are you sure?” I question nervously while nibbling on my bottom lip.
“Yes…unless you want to sit on my lap instead of on your own chair,” he teases and my cheeks flame. I make my way across the kitchen and take the seat next to him. A moment later a plate with two steaming hot pancakes appears in front of me.
“Ladies first,” Trey says as he sets down the plate and hands me a fork.
“Fucker, I’m starving,” Wes complains.
“Patience, asshole. Let her eat first, she needs to get something in her stomach before she takes her meds.”
“Thank you,” I mutter feeling shy. This is different, the interactions, their personalities, the way they’re talking. I’m not really sure how to act, or what to say. On top of that, I’m overwhelmed with everything taking place. They’re caring for me, pampering me even. No one has ever taken care of me like this before and I’m not sure if I should say thank you, or run for the hills. Are they expecting something from me in return?
Of course we had staff at the house who waited on me, but those people did that because they were paid to. Wes, Trey, and Declan take care of me because they want to. They want me.
A deep growling from my belly pulls me from my thoughts. I take a large bite of my pancake before loading another huge bite onto the fork and holding it up to Wes’s mouth. He smiles at me and playfully takes it off my fork.
“Thanks, Princess,” he mutters, swallowing the bite without even chewing. Jesus, he really must be hungry.
I’m so enthralled eating my pancake, that I don’t even notice when Declan walks in until he takes the remaining spot beside me. He shoves down into the seat with a plate and fork in hand.
“Are you fucking kidding me! Why does he get pancakes before me? I’m withering away over here.” Wes pouts and I softly laugh.
“God, quit being such a baby,” Declan growls before ripping off a large piece of his pancake and throwing it across the table at Wes.
“Wow, very mature,” Wes says, catching the pancake and shoving it into his mouth.
I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry. I’ve never experienced anything like this. Having breakfast together with people you like spending time with, laughing and teasing each other. I’m used to spending breakfast and every other meal of the day the same way…alone.
So this is different, but a good kind of different. This feels like…a family.
A real family.