“He didn’t give me the truck,” I admit, tossing my cigarette butt on her father’s grave. “I just borrowed it. And then I didn’t return it.”
She gives me a slow smile, looking impressed. “You stole it?”
“Kind of,” I say. “But I don’t think he’ll call the cops. And he did give me other stuff. Jewelry and clothes and shit. I don’t think he’s looking for an escort, but I’ll see if he has a friend, okay?”
She nods, tossing her cigarette butt in the withered grass near mine. “Thanks,” she says. “And Harper… Can I ask you one more thing?”
I shrug.
“If something happens to me… I mean, I have Olive. If I ever don’t come home, can you get her and keep her safe?”
“What about your mom?”
She shakes her head, scuffing her toe in the dirt.
I swallow hard, knowing I can’t take care of a kid, not the way she does. But for girls like us, trusted adults are few and far between. They’re no more likely to be a help to us than the cops. We make our own way in the world, and we only have ourselves, and sometimes, each other. I know Blue wouldn’t ask me if she had anyone else.
I nod and attempt a smile, but it feels more like a grimace. “Okay.”
We walk back in silence. By the time we get home, it’s mostly dark. I take down the tailgate, and we sit on it and smoke another cigarette in silence. When we finish, we climb down, and Blue wipes her hands on her jeans. “School starts in a week,” she says. “Are you coming back?”
I know I should care, but I can’t summon the energy. My scholarship is gone. There’s no way out. I’ve given up, accepted the fact that I’ll be just like my mother.
“I don’t know,” I say. “I hadn’t really thought about it.”
But later, lying in my bed, I think maybe it’s time I did.
thirteen
Royal Dolce
I open Baron’s door and pull up short. Lo is sprawled on her back across the California king, her arms wide and her blonde hair fanned out around her while her legs stretch up the upholstered headboard. Her skirt pools around her hips, exposing long, tan legs.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” I ask.
She sits up, throwing her hair back like a fucking stripper and curling her legs on the bed beside her. “Oh, hey, Royal,” she says, like she didn’t sell me out to a snake.
“Why are you in my brother’s room?” I ask again, my voice hard.
“Unlike you, your brothers didn’t kick me to the curb the second prom was over,” she says. “So, I’m hanging out. What does it look like?”
“Do you really want me to answer that question?”
She runs her fingers through her blonde strands, bleached from a summer on the beach, and straightens her spine. “In case you’ve forgotten, I’m still in high school,” she says. “While you and Dawson go traipsing off to college, I’m stuck here for another year before Yale notices me.”
“And letting two guys take turns with you all year is going to get you noticed? I’m not sure you understand how college admission works.”
“Fuck you, Royal. Just because Harper ran off when you dumped her, that doesn’t give you a license to make everyone else as miserable as you.”
“You sure about that?” I mutter, unable to hold onto my anger when she’s looking at me with such unflinching, raw hurt in her eyes.
Baron emerges from the bathroom and nods at me before dropping into his recliner. “What’s up?”
“Get her out of here,” I say. It’s easier to be a dick through him. “She’s not welcome here anymore.”
Baron raises a brow and reaches for his cup of suckers.
“What did I ever do to you?” Lo demands.