That’s the cold truth.
It’s going to be difficult, but there’s no other choice. If I spend time alone with Faye – with her scent, wavy brown hair, and that cute quirk on her lips, like she’s waiting for me to kiss her – I won’t be able to resist.
I’ll break apart.
“Are you sure you don’t want to stay?” Lola says after dinner.
I shake my head, rising from my chair.
I can’t. I don’t trust myself.
“I’m tired from the flight,” I tell her. “But it was so good to see you. I missed you.”
“I missed you too, Dad.”
We hug at the door, Faye lingering in the background.
She’s twisting her hair around her finger, repeatedly making me want to stalk over to her. I’d grab her hands, tell her to stop fidgeting, and focus on the kiss, our hands moving all over each other and the heat burning endlessly between us.
“See you later,” I say, turning away quickly.
I walk out of the apartment, my heart beating heavily, a deep drumbeat.
I rush out of the building and down the stairs, almost running across the street.
“It’s okay,” I mutter, my chest rising and falling quickly.
But there’s no way I can convince myself there’s anything remotely okay about this. My entire being feels twisted up, as though I walked into that apartment as one man and left another.
Leaning back, I forcibly slow my breathing.
Surely there’s a way for me to fight this…even if fighting it, even if the idea of not pursuing her makes me feel sick—physically sick in my belly, like it’s wrong to even try.
If I don’t claim her, somebody else might.
I don’t know what I’d do then. Probably lose my cool in a way I never do, in a way most people probably think my grumpy cold ass is incapable of.
My phone buzzes from my pocket. It’s Lola.
Hey Dad. Here’s Faye’s number so you can arrange the work stuff xxx
I clench my jaw as I stare at her phone number, knowing the temptation just got far more difficult to resist. But maybe this could be a good thing. I could fire her over the phone before she starts work, letting her down gently and saying there’s been a change of plan.
Maybe I should leave the city again, get away from her, try to get her out of my head.
My insides twist up even more at that thought as if snapping at me that I can’t even think about that, can’t entertain it even for a second.
I can’t leave my woman.
Thanks, I text Lola. I’ll be in touch with her soon. Love you xxx