Tali
I tookmy time in the bathroom, steadying myself. The look Jude gave me before I made my escape had been equal parts tormented and angry. It knocked me off balance, nearly taking my knees from under me.
I had no interest in Mo, but Jude had no right to the jealousy he was broadcasting like an emergency alert system, breaking into my regularly scheduled program to blast its presence in my face.
With a fresh coat of lipstick and my hair neatly brushed, I opened the bathroom door, and nearly closed it again when I found Jude leaning against the wall in the dim hallway.
“Stripes.”
“No. That isn’t okay. And your growly routine down there was beyond inappropriate.” I crossed my arms over my chest, keeping my back against the opposite wall.
“Here’s the thing: I look at you, and you look like mine. Seeing some kid touch you like that…it made me feel violent. He’s lucky I’d rather be here with you than pounding my fist into his face.”
I should have hated every word he said. The feminist in me despised chest-thumping men who saw women as possessions. But...this was Jude. I’d always been attracted to the edge of danger in him. And hearing him say he saw me as his sent waves of unbidden pleasure down my spine.
Which was exactly why I had to get out of there. Dark hallways with Jude were too tempting.
“No. I’m going back out there with everyone else.”
I started to move past him, but his arm shot out, grasping my wrist. My purse went flying out of my hand, contents scattering. Thankfully, I wasn’t carrying much, but I immediately dropped to my knees to find my most precious possession—the last thing I’d want Jude to see. I found my lipstick and wallet, compact and brush, but nothing else.
“Baby, is this what you’re searching for?”
Slowly, I turned, still on my knees, to see Jude holding my bracelets. “Give them to me.”
He ran his thumb over the beads on one, and examined the thread on the other before handing them back to me. I tucked them away in my purse and accepted his proffered hand, pulling me up from the ground.
He kept pulling until my chest was a hair’s breadth from his. “You can’t tell me you’ve been walking around with the bracelet I gave you the first day we met and you have no feelings for me. You can’t tell me we’re finished forever.”
“I have the bracelet Ben gave me too.” My voice was weak, my defenses falling, and I hated it. I’d kept those bracelets close, even though I couldn’t keep them on my wrist. They were a talisman, a tangible reminder of both Ben and Jude.
“Tali, talk to me.” He dipped his head, trying to get me to look at him.
My hands went up to his chest, intending to push him away, but once I felt the solid warmth of him, I just...couldn’t.
“You think I want this? Do you think I want to still be hung up on my college boyfriend?”
Jude’s hand slid up the back of my neck to fist my hair, tipping my chin so there was no avoiding his gaze. “Don’t do that. Don’t dismiss what we had as some young love bullshit. We were so much more than that. We still are, and if you try to deny it, you’re lying to us both.”
My fingers curled into the hard muscles of Jude’s chest, showing no mercy at his wince. “Do you know the first time I went out with another man, I came home and vomited? The first time I slept with someone else, I had to stop him in the middle because I began sobbing uncontrollably. The first time I started to fall in love…well, you were there. You know how that turned out. It took me years not to want to claw my traitorous heart out when I developed feelings for someone else, but I’m not sure I’ve ever been in love again.Nothinghas ever come close to what we had.”
His eyes shut for a moment, torment flashing across his features, and he let out a slow exhale. “I’m so sorry, baby. I’m just so damn sorry.” Jude’s arm banded around my waist, pulling me flush against him. “You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved.”
It felt natural to be back in his arms, and hearing those words had my heart pumping faster, but I couldn’t let myself lean into it.
“Is that a good thing, Jude? It can’t be. This can’t be good.”
“I don’t know about good or bad. I just know right. Andthisis so fucking right.” He lowered his head, coming close to my mouth, but hesitating. His breath spilled across my lips, and the long list of reasons I should push him away and make a run for it began to unfurl in my mind.
Jude’s lips crashing into mine sent all logic and reason skittering into the void. The hand fisting my hair came down to cuff my wrists together and raise them over my head, pressing them to the wall so there was nothing to create distance between us.
No longer in control, I arched into him and parted my lips to let his tongue sweep inside. He tasted the same, but newer, sweeter. Where he once always had the taste of beer or smoke on his breath, he was now fresh, pure Jude without any alterations.
His free hand skated over the curve of my waist, wrapping around my ribs and up to cup my jaw. He tipped my head to the side, kissing me deeper, harder, stealing my breath and my resolve. When he let go of my hands, I wrapped them around his neck, digging my fingers into his hair.
We kissed like the only cure for our mutual madness would be found in each other’s mouths. His tongue lashed mine, punishing, and then soothing away the ache. I whimpered with each stroke, needing more, but unsure I could possibly take it.
My legs went weak, but Jude caught me, gripping my thighs and lifting me until our cores were aligned. He pressed forward, thick and hard against me, and my head fell back on the wall with athunk.