His utterly remorseful and slightly tormented tone had me softening. It kept me in that dark hallway, talking to him.
“It’s possible I overreacted. This is a strange situation for me.”
He huffed a wry laugh. “Me too.”
“But you knew I’d be here. You knew you’d see me. Jin could’ve given me a heads up.”
He rubbed the back of his neck and gave me a sheepish smile. “Yeah…I didn’t tell him.”
He had me confused. “Why? I thought the two of you talked all the time.”
“We do, but I didn’t want him to tell me this was a bad idea. Or worse, to tell you and have you say you didn’t want me here.”
I would have. If I’d known Jude had been hired, I would have done everything in my power to have his offer rescinded. It would have been my knee-jerk, visceral reaction. Not mature, and certainly not professional, but there it was. The raw, honest truth.
Jude tipped his chin, his eyes finding mine, even in the dark. “I’m not sorry to be here.”
I let myself smile at him. “On this tour or in this hallway?”
He smiled back at me. “Both. Although, I’d like to know why it’s so fucking dark back here.”
I couldn’t stop the laugh that slipped out. “I have no idea, but it’s making this easier.”
“Talking to me?”
“Yeah.”
“Then I guess I’ll have to make sure to lurk in dark hallways more often. Maybe we can have some more conversations.”
It was tempting, to be drawn in by him. He reminded me of the way he’d been when we first met. When he made me laugh and throw out all my plans. But I knew what was on the other end of this dark hallway, and it wasn’t pretty. I wasn’t sure I wanted to walk that way.
“I’m going to head back now,” I said, holding up my beer. “I need to eat something or this will go straight to my head.”
Jude walked behind me through the crowded restaurant. When I nearly collided with a waitress carrying a tray of drinks, he laid his palm on the small of my back to steer me around her. Electricity, which had been buried underground and dormant for a decade, sparked to life, forcing the air from my lungs in short pants. I turned my head, catching sight of him out the corner of my eye. He had to have seen how he was affecting me, but his hand remained in place until we got to the private room.
“Liberties, Jude,” I murmured.
He removed his hand, but didn’t rush. “My apologies, Stripes.”
At that, we split off, Jude returning to his original seat while I found a spot with the band at a large, round table. There were around fifty people here now, the room buzzing with different conversations going on at once.
“Who was that gentleman manhandling you?” asked Dalia, Nick Fletcher’s wife.
“Old friend.”
She arched one of her red eyebrows. “I have a confession.”
“I’m intrigued.”
She shifted closer. “You know how when you’re a kid and you run into your teacher out to dinner with her family, or at the grocery store, and it kind of blows your mind?”
I let out a short laugh, unsure where this was going. “Yes...like it’s hard to believe they exist outside of school.”
She pointed a finger at me. “Yes! You get it. Anyway, you’re kind of like that. We never see you in a capacity outside of band manager, so—”
“So, you think when I’m done working for the night, I go back to my closet and plug myself in?”
I wasn’t even offended, although I probably should have been. Though I’d been working closely with Blue is the Color for years and we spent a lot of time together, it was work. I kept my life separate from that—not that I had an exciting life outside of hanging with rock stars. I cared about the band—I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t—but I tried to keep a somewhat professional distance between us.