I sat on the bench watching him run around. The sound of his laughter filled the gap in my heart Layla’s absence had left behind. It made the longing worthwhile.
“Daddy, look. Birds.” He jumped up and down with excitement. It wasn’t something I could describe, the way I felt whenever he called me Daddy.
That was probably the day I missed her the most, the day I had to tell him who I was. It was something I wanted to do with her at my side. A moment I wanted to share with her. But unfortunately, it didn’t work out that way. It was something I had to do on my own, and I expected it to be difficult—especially for him. It took me two days to decide which was the best way for me to tell him…until Karina had finally convinced me there was no “best” way to tell a four-and-a-half-year-old that you were the dad he had never known. For Christ’s sake, I was a total stranger to him. All of us were. Even after Layla had taken him to Kate, he was sent to a children’s home to live like an orphan among children he didn’t know. The trauma this tiny boy had to go through…goddammit, just thinking about it made every muscle in my body go taut with anger. It made Matteo’s mutilated face pop into my head, the image soothing away my rage. That was one memory of that night I chose to hold on to. The memory of revenge.
Yet after preparing myself to experience the crying and confusion of a small boy, Rafe surprised me by merely staring at me for a few seconds, and then uttered the words which made the tainted heart inside my chest swell.
“I’ve always wanted a daddy.”
That moment made my entire world shift on its axis. The foundation my life had been built on was shaken by five little words—the words of a boy I had now devoted my entire existence to.
“I thought I’d find you here.”
Antonio took a seat beside me, his eyes fixed on Rafe chasing the birds. “You two have been spending a lot of time here lately.”
“Yeah. Rafe loves the garden.”
Antonio placed his hand on the bench then glanced around. “I love what you did with it. You know,” he waved around, “the whole re-doing of the back garden.”
I snorted. “Re-doing?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, well. You should thank Karina. She did all this.”
“Our sister will make a good mother someday.”
“She sure will.”
Karina was a godsend through all this. Rafe had immediately taken to her, and even though she couldn’t fully take his mother’s place, she had done a fine job being a substitute while he adapted to his new surroundings. New family.
“How is he doing?” Antonio asked while watching Rafe play.
I leaned forward with my elbows on my knees. “He misses her.”
“That’s to be expected.”
“I just wish I knew how long it was going to take.”
Antonio placed his hand on my shoulder. “Don’t rush it. Give it as much time as it takes to heal.”
I sighed. “I know. I’m trying.”
“You’re doing good, brother. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
I smiled as I glanced at him. “Thanks.” I sat back. “And how are you doing?”
He took a deep breath before pulling his hand through his hair. “Okay, I guess. It all happened so suddenly, with Dad’s death, it’s going to take a while to get a handle on everything.”
“Well, if anyone can do it, it’s you.”
He shifted. “I’ll find him, Dante. Even if it’s the last thing I do.”
“I know you will.”
I shared Antonio’s lust for revenge against Stefano. My dad saved my life by taking a bullet for me. Stefano and his dead sons had caused our family enough pain. It was time he paid for his sins against us. But for now, Rafe needed all of my attention, which was why I left the hunt for Stefano Mancuso to my brother, at least until I’d decided what our future held. Whether it was here with the rest of my family, or somewhere else, I didn’t know yet.
I glanced at my brother. “Revenge is a big burden to carry, Antonio.”