Stepping beneath the warm spray, she closed her eyes and let her worries melt away. There was nothing here that could hurt her. She had to remember she was in charge of her own fate.
Reaper wouldn’t touch her.
She opened her eyes.
What if she wanted him to touch her?
Shaking those thoughts and feelings aside, she felt a little sick to her stomach, and she wasn’t about to even acknowledge her growing feelings for a man she didn’t know.
Preacher was back at home and even though he hadn’t been able to find her yet, she knew deep in her heart it wouldn’t take him long.
Nine months.
He’s supposed to be one of the best bad guys and he can’t even find me.
She clenched her hands into fists.
There was no way Preacher would ever be able to find her. Not with how Reaper moved. There was no way for him to find her. Reaper always made sure to be the last one into any hotel room.
All of this was for nothing.
She turned the shower off and climbed out of the stall. Reaper liked to play a certain role, and when they were near the cameras, she’d come to see a pattern. He’d grab her, and to anyone looking, it would appear as if he was hurting her. His men would always play the part, but Reaper never hurt her. She no longer fought him, and she didn’t know how that looked to the cameras. She hoped if Preacher was ever close and he saw her in those cameras, he’d see the lie for what it was and know she was in fact perfectly happy and healthy.
Well, not happy.
She had failed to graduate, which pissed her off purely because she’d spent all that time studying. One day, she had hoped to go to college, but it would seem her dream was never going to come true. Then of course there was the chance she would’ve never gotten free from the club to even go to college. Bishop had always acted like she’d be his wife for eternity with no life for herself. Her only job on the planet would be to please him.
Even after all this time, thinking about Bishop angered her beyond comprehension. She hated him. When she saw him again, she was going to hurt him.
Pushing those thoughts to the side, she instead focused on just … being. She wrapped a towel around her body and dried herself off. She didn’t look at her reflection. There was nothing she wanted to see right now. No pain. No fear. No feelings.
She was too scared to even give herself a chance to think about what any of this meant to her.
After pulling on a large shirt, she ran a brush through her hair and climbed into bed. She lay down beneath the blanket, even though it was too hot. She stared toward the window and saw the outline of Reaper as he came back home.
He opened the door then closed and locked it. He didn’t say a single word as he left, going into the bathroom. Reaper always slept naked and nothing would stop that.
She stayed perfectly still as he returned to her. He no longer wore a towel and the bed dipped as he joined her. She waited. He lay flat on his back, looking up at the ceiling.
Normally, she would turn away from him and try to keep them both separate.
This time, she stared at him.
“You keep on looking and it’s going to give me a complex,” he said.
“I don’t think it’s possible for you to even get a complex.”
He chuckled.
Instead of looking at the ceiling, he turned toward her, giving her his full attention. “Is this what you want?” he asked.
“I don’t know what it is I want.” She was only trying to be honest. “How are you feeling?”
“You’re asking me quite a few personal questions there. Should I be worried?”
“No. It’s fine. It’s nothing.”
“Talk to me, Robin. What is going on in that head of yours?”
“Nothing.”
“I don’t know. It doesn’t look like a whole lot of nothing to me. Tell me what is going on in that little head of yours.”
“Little?”
“You know it’s a lot more than that.” He winked at her.
She lifted her hand and without thinking, she cupped his cheek.
Reaper’s smile disappeared.
Tears filled her eyes as she leaned forward and kissed him.
Reaper pulled away. “Don’t cry. Don’t kiss me if you’re going to cry about it. You’re going to give a guy a complex.”
She laughed. “I’m nervous.”
“Why?”
“What if … what if you’re going to use this against me? Hurt me? I don’t want to be hurt. I want to believe in this. I’m crazy. How can I even be thinking of this? You only took me to hurt someone I love.”
Reaper kissed her. He ran the back of his knuckles across her cheek. “I won’t use this against you. I won’t ever hurt you. This, right here, is between us. I won’t break your trust.”