“I didn’t want you to find out that way,” he rushes to say, his hand going to my knee. Unable to control myself, I flinch and he notices.
Of course he does.
His hand tightens on my knee and I glance over at him, my eyes welling with tears. “You hurt me.”
His expression tightens, his gaze flat. As if he has no emotion. Or he’s trying to keep them contained. “You ran away before I could fully explain.”
He’s right. I did run away. And I never went back. I couldn’t face the humiliation and besides…
My father wouldn’t let me.
“What could you say to explain yourself?” I ask. “It’s obvious what you did to me. To us.”
“I wasn’t in love with her,” he admits. “Not anymore. Not after us, and what we shared. I fell in love with—”
“Don’t say that,” I interrupt, not wanting to hear any declarations of love. He doesn’t mean it. He’s trying to convince me he’s a good guy, while I sit here tied up. The irony isn’t lost on me. “You don’t mean it.”
“You don’t know what I mean, or how I feel. You never gave me the chance to explain any of it. How sweet you were. How I fell under your spell. You were so naïve, so innocent. You soaked up every word I said to you, and I loved it. Those big blue eyes following me as I spoke in front of the class. As if you couldn’t get enough of me,” he says, his gaze distant, as if he’s lost in his memories.
I stroked his ego. That’s why he supposedly fell for me, but it doesn’t sound like love now. I didn’t know much about him beyond that he was from Ireland and passionate about classic European architecture. Oh, and that he was older and seemed so wise and worldly. I was just as he described me—an innocent little girl who’d grown up sheltered her entire life. Given the opportunity to get out into the world, and I did the most impulsive, stupidest thing ever…
Had an affair with my professor.
I think of Perry and how he initially irritated me. His easygoing nature was an annoyance—until he won me over, slowly but surely. The more time we spent together, I discovered his protective nature, his intuitiveness when it came to my feelings. The spark I feel when he looks at me, touches me, kisses me…
That feels more like love.
“You still seem angry,” he observes, pulling me from my thoughts.
My gaze finds his once more and I give up all pretense. “I don’t like living in the past. There’s no point.”
“Miss your husband?” He lifts his brows.
I say nothing. Can only look away, trying to ease the tension in my jaw.
To admit any feelings for Perry to this man would be stupid. A huge error.
I need to keep everything I feel to myself.
“He’s not who I would choose for you, Charlotte, if I had any say in the matter,” Seamus says. “He doesn’t seem your type.”
I can’t help but glare at him. I feel defensive when it comes to Perry.
“You don’t know him.”
“Neither do you. You only just married the man. He’s basically a stranger. Why does he care where you are, or who you’re with? He’s leaving you alone because he thinks you want to be with me.”
“He knows exactly how I feel about you,” I lie. “And how much I can’t stand you.”
“Right.” Seamus laughs. “Keep telling yourself that.”
“We’ve grown close in a short amount of time.” I lift my chin, daring him to contradict what I’m saying.
“Please. Your relationship is based on nothing but sex,” Seamus continues.
“You know nothing about my relationship with my husband,” I spit out, on the defensive. How would he know? He doesn’t have spies everywhere. Definitely not in Mexico.
“I know enough that you went for a joyride with him in his stupid classic car and he fucked you in a parking garage.” His smile grows, though his gaze is dark.