“So, what’s the deal with Charlotte? Does she stay here a lot?”
Mom sits across from me, drinking her coffee.
“You could say that. She’s had a tough time with her mother in and out.”
The memory of the comic book incident comes to mind. It was such a long time ago, so long I’d forgotten about it.
“That’s still going on?” I question, surprised.
Mom nods. “Like I said earlier, marriage is hard, Alex. I don’t ask questions, but I know Charlotte is strong. She doesn’t deserve to be going through her parents’ battles, so the best thing we can do is offer her a place when she needs it.”
Glancing at the time on my watch, I remember my plan. Inside the drawer under the counter is some stationery Mom keeps in case we need it. Sliding my chair out, I open the drawer and grab the Post-it note and pen to write a message.
“By the way, Dad mentioned something about Adriana’s car playing up,” I lie, though with good intentions behind it. “I’m going to get it checked out because I know Dad is busy.”
Mom smiles. “Thank you, Alex. Your father’s already left for surgery. I’m glad you’re finally thinking about your sister.”
I lean in, kissing Mom on the cheek, then grab Adriana’s keys.
“Anything for my sister,” I answer, closing the door behind me with a smirk on my face.
SIX
The time when Charlotte went on birth control
The moment I ran into Charlotte inside my parents’ kitchen, my life changed.
My heart started beating differently.
My mind became consumed with only the thought of Charlotte.
I tried to fight the feelings, desperately reminding myself every moment I took a breath of my vows needing to remain intact. In front of my family, friends, and God's presence, I made Samantha my wife.
But I could no longer fight.
Every moment with Charlotte only made me desire her more. The force it’s unexplainable. Its power is nothing like I’ve experienced before. Love, lust, and everything two souls find when the connection is so strong, you know it was always meant to be.
Our first kiss—broke me.
In a good way.
And now, I’m living a double life.
The throbbing inside my head refuses to pass despite my earlier effort to consume two Advil. I’d followed with a strong coffee to keep me going for the remainder of the day.
It had been another one of those nights.
Sammy came home in a mood, but I argued back instead of ignoring her like usual until she demanded I stay away from her. It didn’t last long for her to beg me to sleep in our bed, to which I refused. The couch has been my choice of late, another reason she felt compelled to argue our marriage is nothing but a sham.
How could I argue? My thoughts were consumed by Charlotte. The mere idea of my wife touching me felt wrong. There is only one person I can’t stop thinking about, but of course, the guilt eats away at me every single fucking moment I’m awake.
It’s a deadly companion built on shame and selfish principles.
The phone rings inside the small office. My head is buried in paperwork, my least favorite thing about studying medicine. I ignore the noise with the need to focus until Dr. Hanson announces he must attend to a patient. The clinic hasn’t stopped all day, and even he looks worn out after the multiple coffees he has drunk since I clocked on for my shift.
The silence from his departure is welcoming, allowing me to focus on a patient’s file, but it’s short-lived as he re-enters.
“Alex, would you mind sitting in on this consult. It’s pretty straightforward, and frankly, we can make it quick as I can use the break.”