There it is again, that unsettling panic of earlier. Ripping its way through my lungs, looking for the escape it’ll never find. My heartbeat pounds, glancing between the two. Feral and wild, it thunders.
Silas wouldn’t. He couldn’t…
My attention shifts back to the person opposite him, already knowing the answer.
…He is.
Silas is going to do it.
No fight, no remorse for anyone else but himself. Silas’s eyes are an unsettling shade of hazel. The green in them darkens with vivid clarity.
The eyes of someone who’s inhuman.
A strangled cough sounds around the room, but I only realize it’s coming from me after everyone’s gazes shift my way.
I hadn’t meant for it to slip out. Even more shocking, I’m surprised I’d somehow found the air to do it to begin with.
The noise had been unexpected but a feeling inside my gut tells me not to waste the opportunity. I doubt I’ll ever get another. So that’s what I do, seize the moment.
Try, even if, in the end, I know it’ll do nothing at all.
I’m panicking on the inside, but I refuse to let anyone see it. It’s not me who should be worried.
“Finn, what did you tell me that day?” I ask boldly. “That day in the parking lot after you’d all found me. You told me something.”
His face mars with confusion.
“I’d left. Ran away the same as every other time something bad happened to me. Only this time was different. You all came back for me.Youcame back.”
I take a step and my heart jackhammers. Everyone is watching me. Even with Cole now at my back, I can feel his curious stare as it follows.
That’s alright because I’m just as confused.
“Do you remember what you said?” I ask softer now but not any less impactful.
I have no idea if this is the right time to share this, but deep down, I know the truth. I’ve known for a while I just refused to admit it.
Everyone else knew it, saw it. I’m the only one who refused to open my eyes. To see what’s been in front of me the entire time. Accept who I am, who I’ve always been.
“I said, we’re Caspers. We stick together,” Finn says. That confusion shifts to recognition but there’s still that underlining uncertainty about where this is going.
My chin lifts with a determined nod. “That’s right, and what did you do for me that day by coming to get me?”
“Made sure we stick together.”
Another nod.
“And that day on the roller coaster, I’d been scared and unsure I could do it, but what did you make sure we did?”
Finn swallows, voice stronger now. “Stick together.”
“How many times have I told you and everyone else that when I turned eighteen, I planned on leaving? Heading out. And what did you do? You threw me a birthday party anyway, even with your doubts. Knowing my plans, you still did that.”
Finn’s mouth lifts, but his expression is empty. Eyes going over my shoulder before landing back down at me when I start again. Cole doesn’t have the answers, only me.
“You did it because we stick together, right? What have I done since then? I haven’t left.” My jaw sets correcting myself. “Ididn’tleave.”
His mouth hooks higher, finally catching on. “You made sure we stick together.”