Of course, the other difference with Colt was that we had just as much fun together outside of the bedroom as in it. We’d danced the night away, laughed, talked, and spent time with the people we loved. Now, just like all the other couples, we’d come home together and the next part of the evening could begin.
Except that we’re not a real couple.
As soon as the thought entered my brain, I shoved it right back out. I knew it was true, but it just didn’t feel like it was that simple anymore. The fact was that I was falling for himhard, and if I hadn’t known any better, I’d have thought he felt the same way.
He postponed his trip, didn’t he? That has to mean something.
Colt groaned into my mouth. His fingers combed my hair back, and his hot hard body on top of mine pressed me into his mattress as he kissed me like a man possessed. I gave up on thinking when I heard that low sound rumbling out of him, determined to focus on the here and now.
Wrapping my legs around his hips, I put one of my hands on his jaw and the other on the nape of his neck, returning his passionate kisses with every bit of the wild abandon I felt when we were together.
He trembled against me as he dragged his tip through my wet heat, his breath leaving him in a rush as our lips parted. “What are you doing to me?”
“I thought it was obvious,” I joked. “It’s called hooking up. Why? Have you never done it before?”
He chuckled against my lips, his dark eyes coming to rest on mine as he pulled away to look at me. “Do you really think it’s wise to tease when I can feel how much you want me? But no. If you must know, I’ve never hooked up like this before.”
My pathetic, lovestruck heart suddenly switched to a staccato rhythm. “What do you mean?”
Still looking deep into my eyes, he cocked his head and gently brushed the hair off my forehead. “I don’t know, Em. I didn’t plan any of this, but there’s a lot of stuff that just doesn’t make sense to me right now.”
“We don’t make sense to you?” I nearly burst out crying, so caught up in the emotion of the moment that all my feelings were swimming around right underneath the surface.
Colt frowned, fingers still gently caressing my forehead even though I doubted there was any hair left there now. “No, that’s not it. We do make sense to me. What doesn’t is why I never noticed it before.”
I cradled his cheek in my hand, my fingers mimicking the movement of his on my skin. “You were a little preoccupied with leaving back then. You had graduation and were trying to make enough money to go. Then your parents’ accident happened, and you had Teddy to worry about. Honestly, I don’t blame you for not noticing.”
“Did you?” he asked. “Notice, I mean.”
Soft, shy laughter came out of me.God, if only you knew how much I noticed it.“Yeah, I did. I noticed, but I wasn’t going to point it out when it was right in front of you. Besides, you had a lot going on. I didn’t want to add to the burden.”
“You could never have been a burden, but I’m sorry if I made you feel like you were. I don’t know what the fuck was going on with my priorities back then.”
“Your priorities were what any late teenage boy’s priorities should be, Colt. You were focused on your future and making your dreams come true. Then you were focusing on your family and doing what you and Teddy needed just to survive.”
“Sure, but do you ever wonder what could’ve happened if you had been a part of my priorities like I’m starting to think you should’ve been?”
“Only every day since you left,” I admitted honestly. “You shouldn’t say stuff like that to me, though. It’s the heat of the moment and you’ll be leaving soon.”
“I’m not going anywhere just yet,” he murmured, lowering his lips back to mine and kissing me just as deeply as before. “I’m right here, Emma. Be here with me.”
“I am,” I managed to say between kisses, feeling tears pricking at my eyes before I closed them and gave myself over to him wholeheartedly. With the conversation out of the way, our hands roamed and explored every nook and cranny.
I was aching for him, and I felt the shudders and heard the hisses that said he was aching for me too, but we didn’t speed up. We kissed and touched, lips and fingertips dragging, tasting, and feeling. My hips bucked when his fingers slid into me, but even that was slow and tender. As was my orgasm when I came apart on his hand. Twice.
When he finally sank into me, it was with his gaze once again firmly fixed on mineand our hands joined together. The only thing between us right now was latex, but even that felt like too much. Everything about this experience was overwhelmingly romantic, and when his release finally triggered mine, I almost started crying again just because the moment was so beautiful.
We lay together, basking in the afterglow, and I knew I had to see this thing between us through. Chances were that I’d end up getting hurt again. Badly.
But this was our second chance. If I didn’t at least try now, I’d never know what might have been. There had to be a reason I hadn’t gotten over him. A reason why I’d clung to the darn torch I’d been carrying for him for so long, despite all indications that it was never going to happen for us. This was the opportunity I’d been waiting for, to see if we could make it work.
If Colt could ever be mine the way I’d always wanted him to be.
All I had to do now was to show him that Rockdale was the right place for us to land. His fierce determination to get out of here had been one of the biggest reasons why I hadn’t even tried to get in a real relationship with him before, but he’d gotten out and seen what the world had to offer. Maybe that would be enough to get him to lay down some roots now.
He’d know he wasn’t missing out on anything and it wasn’t like he couldn’t travel from here. I knew it would take a lot to convince him to stay, but I was living on love and the hope it provided. I had to hope that this had all been part of our destiny and that he’d come around eventually.
We’d let each other go once. He’d spread his wings, gotten a taste of the life he’d wanted so badly, and then he’d come back. For his sister’s wedding, sure, but maybe I could change his mind about leaving again.